Needed At Home

Unexpected, by Edward Lamson Henry, 1841-1919

At seven A.M., I don't envy the mob

Who rise, shine and shower and go to the job.

In rain, sleet or storm, whether snowing or blowing,

I stay home and savor the joys of not going.

Cheers to you dears out fulfilling yourselves.

I'll bake me a cake, and I'll straighten my shelves,

I'll write some light verse and I'll practice some Bach...

If my neighbor drops in, I'll take time for a talk.

I'd rather have a family than fortune or fame;

I don't think my apron's a Red Badge of Shame.

You're welcome to banking, computers and math,

Guns, plumbing and business. I'll take a hot bath.

Art, music, letters--the good things of life

Are no less my own, since I'm mother and wife.

If I scrub, mop or dig in the garden, I'm free...

Remember, the choices were all made by me.

Helene Lewis Coffer 

These are a few of the verses in an old poem that encouraged me through the years, especially as pressures increased to get women to seek careers and pursue other interests and work away from the home and the family.

What does it take to be a successful housewife, who stays in it through every crisis and every rumour that would send weaker people running to the work place to exchange their time and their children's time, for a wage?  Well, it takes a few simple qualities that can be developed through practice:

It takes a deep belief in what the scriptures teach women to be and to do. It takes a strong respectful fear of the Lord and a strong concern your soul.  It takes women who know that believing  God exists is not enough; they must do what He commands in the scriptures.  Titus 2, First Timothy 5:13-14, First Timothy 2:9-10, and other verses are the same today, in a world crisis, or not.  When Jesus comes to reward his servants, he wants to find them working at the work that they were instructed to do. Women have been given a great mission: to guide the home. It is greater than anything else, no matter what other voices may say. Titus 2 has no loopholes and no alternatives. To be successful at home, a woman needs to know that God is her ultimate employer and that He is the great rewarder to those who do what is right, no matter what the cost.

Reminiscing painted by B. Saunders

It takes women of resolve. Outside pressures will sometimes shake a woman's resolve, and she will question herself. She may give up her time at home and her time with her children, to bring home money, but money is not what brings stability and strong spiritual values in a family. There are so-called official polls and reports in abundance claiming that more educated or high-income people will have more stable families; i.e. lasting marriages and untroubled children, but this is actually not true.  Even the most uneducated people can have a good life and a stable family  if they are faithful to the Word of God. Adhering to the statutes of the Bible bring stability and peace. Education is helpful only if it is based on the values of the scriptures, which teach how to live.

  There is that maketh himself rich, yet hath nothing: there is that maketh himself poor, yet hath great riches.  Proverbs 13:7

Girl Picking Poppies, by Daniel Ridgeway Knight 1839-1924

It takes resolute, persistent, tenacious,  valiant, undaunted, undismayed, unshrinking, fearless and daring, unmovable determination to be a wise and purposeful homemaker.  It is common to be asked: "Don't you know that our nation is in a financial down slide? Why are you staying home? You are living in a dream world! What about retirement money? What about benefits? What about the future? Why don't you wake up and smell the coffee?"

 All around us, today we see enticing advertising aimed at the housewives, trying to get them into college, and eventually, out working for other people. It is so important to know what you stand for, and not fall for everything that comes along and promises something great. Even if it is free, it does not mean you are obligated to take it.

Mother Playing With Children in an Interior, by Helen Allingham 1848-1926



 Sometimes "free" comes with a terrible price. Teen children need their parents more emotionally than people know, and this is often the time when mothers choose to go to college or to work. Some women lose their own children, spiritually, emotionally, and physically, in order to go after a degree. There is nothing in the Bible that demands that homemakers get degrees, but it is a big attraction these days, and it is, ultimately all about making money.  Many who have received these degrees have found that the jobs are not available which their education promised they would have. Titus 2 does not mention a "degree," but our nation in general, over-rates education, even elevating it above spiritual values.

Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye stedfast, unmoveable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as ye know that your labour is not in vain in the Lord. First Corinthians 15:58

 Some friends, relatives and church members take a long time to understand that the basis of being a keeper at home is belief.   One sign of faith, or belief, is the way we live, and the way we act out those beliefs. 


  A homemaker may have some worried or "concerned" friends who are always urging her to "get a job," but she already has a job. The home is the most neglected institution on earth. Even those who stay home full time, admit there is never enough time in the day to do all the things that must be done. Many women do not even have children, or have children grown and gone from the house, and still realize they need to be home to keep it clean, orderly, and to look after their husbands.


 But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.  Hebrews 11:6

It takes a belief that is stronger than the circumstances. Women are needed in the home, but there are constant efforts to undermine them and unsettle them.  They will hear that the circumstances don't allow women the luxury of being at home,or that the economy, the threat of war, the political climate, the uncertainty of having a stable family, or the fear of a medical disaster, warrant women ignoring the Word of God and going to work. Some reports claim that the government doesn't allow women to stay home. My belief is that if God commanded women to be keepers at home, there will always be a way to do it.  Today, people cave in to the threat of losing material possessions, or being shunned by society, and many other things. They do not see the spiritual benefits or the material benefits of being their own boss in their own homes full time.

 Sometimes people even say that they believe what the Bible says about the importance of women in the home, but only so far as "the circumstances will allow."  In other words: if it is easy, convenient, not controversial, popular, socially acceptable, and affordable, it is viable.  Many of us lived back in a time when people were much worse off, but the women, poor or rich, proudly kept house and were the queens of their homes. Leaving the home to go to work elsewhere was universally known to be disaster to marriage, home-life and children.

 Belief and determination have to be stronger than financial pressure or circumstances. We cannot allow  circumstances to rearrange our stability. We must pursue the course, steady on, ignoring distractions and threats of disaster.  I have now lived long enough to remember decade after decade of  "the world is coming to an end" news reports designed to mobilize people into certain decisions that would take them from their home and family. We have all seen  the real disaster when children are put out to pasture, marriages dissolved, and family members without stability. It has been said that for every thing God tells us to do in His Word, he also provides a way to do it. Sometimes people make things difficult or stressful by limiting their thinking to one way.

It takes resourcefulness: This means to look for ways to do things when supplies and circumstances seem impossible. Sometimes families will just give up when difficulties come.  Difficulties give us a chance to be resourceful. While it is painful to be without money or conveniences, once someone has gone through a period of reduced circumstances, they come out stronger, knowing better ways to live, more self-reliant and being less of a burden on others. Learning how to make everything than you can, limits your spending to only those items you could not possibly make, yourself.  

 Treating all household items carefully so that they will be strong and sturdy, prevents having to replace them, which is an expense.  Keeping the house clean prevents decay and deterioration. Being resourceful means to think further than your first instinct, when it comes to spending money. It means to think, "How can I do this, have this, make-do without something, or create something, with the things I already have, or how can I do it with practically nothing?"  Not all homemakers will have to do this. Many people live in relative luxury and comfort just because they are wise shoppers and do not waste.

These characteristics can be acquired through prayer and steady attention to the job of homemaking. 

Things to Be Aware of  When You Are A Homemaker

Homemakers must not see themselves in a limited light. Others may insinuate that women at home are locked up all day in a house, but they are less limited than women who work for others, as the above poem illustrates.  I am sure everyone understands that women who work at home are not necessarily totally confined to the house. They must go shopping, go to appointments, go on trips, and attend events that interest them.  They are less constricted than the working women, who must schedule in everything around their working hours.

Homemakers need to guard against being regulated by other people in order to prove their worth. Sometimes, in an effort to make others believe that what they are doing is important, women may forget that they need to rest. Rest, leisure time, and creativity is very important to replenish the mind and body. Why stay home, if you work as though you were in a factory?  Rest and leisure are important activities that can also be advantageous to the home and the family. Women of the past greatly valued their creative skills and displayed their handiwork around their houses.

Woman Reading, by John Ferguson Weir, 1865

 Women today need to do something relaxing and creative, and do not need anyone's approval to do so. However, these things need to be re-creative and not wreck-reative. Avoid vices like gambling, drinking, partying, and smoking. These reduce your femininity and your bank account, instead of building your capabilities as a homemaker and increasing your personal wealth. True recreation will be productive, even though it is restful. Reading a book, writing to a friend, taking a walk, knitting, or listening to music are soothing things that will increase your stamina for homemaking. 

Women are needed at home. Even without children, a house or dwelling place needs care. Windows, Floors and bathrooms need to be cleaned, dishes need to be washed and put away, and things need to be put in order. Meals must be prepared and clothes must be washed. The house needs to be looked after and it needs to look like someone lives there who loves the work and wants it to look good.  Women of the past cared for their homes, and whether it was just a shack in the desert or a cabin in the mountains, wanted to sweep and clean and hang pretty curtains, for this was their own domain. 

Woman in a French Interior by Susan Watkins, 1908

God gives the woman a special place in the world, which  gives her privacy and freedom from the oppression of others who would make demands of her time.  She only has to make her husband happy, and make sure he has the things he needs in order to pursue his business. This takes time and organized effort, but it is worth it to have well-planned meals, clean clothes, ironed shirts, and a well-kept house.  This special place is also a refuge and protection from the criticism and stress of the rest of the world.

 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.  Proverbs 31:11

Suggestion: Put the poem in one of your programs, make a border around it, and put it on your refrigerator, or, frame it and put on your desk.

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