Tuesday, March 23, 2010

A Woman's Place



A woman is responsible for guiding and guarding the home. She cannot guard it if she is not free to be home and look after it. God gave her the authority to mind her own business at home and to manage it. 

A woman's place is in the home because there she has freedom.

 Some people assume that a homemaker is just confined to the home and unable to go to and fro freely, but this just is not so. She has much more freedom than any other kind of worker. She is free to go to the market and find high quality food, and to find things for her home that will make it a lovely place to live. She keeps her own schedule according to the needs of her family, and makes her own decisions according to what is best for them.

Visit Here to find out about this lovely 19th century painting

A woman's place is in the home because she has a job to do that does not belong to anyone else.
 Being a home maker is more than cleaning and cooking, although these things are important. She is there for a deeper, spiritual reason, but that does not require that she neglect the cleaning and cooking. Both are wrought together harmoniously. If it were just a matter of good housekeeping, she would not be needed, and any one could be hired to do her job. If it were just a matter of being an advisor, she would miss out on many other fulfilling things that make a home a real home.

A woman is needed at home to put limits on the demands which confront her family. 

Without the woman there to draw the line on spending money,  and busy activities, other people would take advantage of them.  Children need mothers to regulate their activities and their rest. Men need the home to provide a place of good nutrition and lack of stress. Some women become the social secretaries of their homes, appropriately accepting and declining time-c0nsuming activities. Women are needed at home to protect  the health of their husbands by seeing that others do not put stress or extra demands on them.


Time is needed at home for women to devote to spiritual matters:  Caring for a home is one of the most varied and interesting things in the world, and it is easy to get totally absorbed in it. 

 Seasoned homemakers will tell you that they never get caught up on their housework. Therefore it is important to put aside some time each day to meditate and  pray and and settle your mind. Anyone can mechanically keep house, but a woman who has prepared her mind, spiritually, can do it with a greater purpose: to bring her and her family closer to God.

The word of God is called a seed. It has to be planted in the mind and allowed to germinate. A woman who feeds on the word of God will be able to recall what she has read when she is confronted with problems regarding the guiding of the home.  Without this time of meditation and prayer, her job can become material and mechanical.  She needs to set aside some time with her Bible, a pretty notebook, a nice pen, and a hymn book.  It is a good time to get her thoughts together and list a few desires of her heart and pray about them.This time is her own personal worship service, when she dedicates her service to God.  It will make a big difference between a house that is merely cleaned and a house that is cared for.  This will have a big effect on the neighbors and friends who observe her quiet and busy way of life and bring more glory to God.




A woman's place is in the home so that she can teach her children to be refined and respectful. 
(The Reading, by S.Wilson)

 This simply cannot be accomplished fully if her children are in institutions during the most receptive momments of the day, in classrooms that do not uphold the faiths of the families.  As our nation slips into communism and we lose the things that we have worked for, the only things that will make life tolerable are refinement and respect. They alone are things that have to be taught rather than bought.  Women at home can provide these teachings, by insisting on respect and honor for parents, and decent behaviour in the home. Children need to learn to value the things their parents believe in and respect their family traditions. Colleges and workplaces will not provide this. Women belong at home with their families because of the influence they can wield. That is perhaps one reason there is such a resistance to women staying at home.
                                                     
Visit Here to learn more about this lovely painting of the 1800s.

(painting by Helen Allingham)
A woman's place is in the home because there, she does not have to buy everything. She can make things and make do with things. She can preserve what she has rather than constantly replacing it. I know women who can repair their own appliances, fix broken furniture, grow their own food, and sew their own clothes.  They learn every available remedy for children's coughs and bee stings, and figure out how to cut their husbands and children's hair at home. They lose their dependence on spending money for everything. At home, they can wear what they like and not worry about what everyone else thinks. I have seen beautiful blogs where women at home have designed their own clothing and hairstyles and set themselves apart from the prevailing culture. Without spending money, I believe women can be more creative and successful at home.

A woman's place is in the home, to provide hospitality. The fanciest hotels and restaurants, cannot provide the warmth and comfort to widows and lonely people that hospitality in the home can.  Just a hot cup of tea and a piece of toast served graciously in a home especially prepared for guest, provides a greater balm than any social program.  Hospitality is something markedly obvious in the Bible, from Abraham's welcome to strangers, to Lydia's invitation to the apostle Paul (Acts 16:14). 

(Tea Time by Stephen Darbishire)

 Imagine the person enduring a personal crisis just looking for some kind of relief. It is a shame that they turn to this worlds solutions, when only a small extension of hospitality will work wonders.  Women need to be home to be available for any kind of emergency call. It is discouraging to young women when they are looking for encouragement and knowledge, to find all those women absent from their homes because they answered the call to go to work. The Bible gives women a place and gives it to them alone: to guard and guide and keep the home. The world has no  business convincing them to abandon it.
                                                                                     
A woman's place is in the home so that men can be providers and  have a real home to come home to.  When women go to work, they are saying that they have no confidence in their husbands as providers. Unmarried women should try to keep good relations with their parents so that they can be useful at home until they marry and go into their own homes.  When husbands send their wives to work, it is unbliblical and they are taking authority where God has already commanded.  When they demand that women go to work outside the home, they are saying that they have no confidence in them as home keepers, and they are showing they do not believe that God's plan is good enough. 

 Home management skills come with practice, and women need to learn as they go, and grow into good housekeepers. They cannot do that if they are driven from their homes, and forced to work for others. They are wasting their housekeeping and nurturing skills in the workplace, and they are losing a great deal of time that they need to develop into good homemakers.

A woman's place is in the home because it is where she will be under the least pressure to conform to the standards of the prevailing culture. She is accepted for her inner beauty and she encourages her husband and children to respect her and her work.  No one can possibly keep up with feminisms demands to achieve and accomplish so much in the corporate world. No one can keep up with the fashions or the youth oriented culture. Home is where she can have dignity without pressure, just because that is where she belongs ad that is where she reigns.

A woman's place is in the home, because that is where her greatest authority is.  No other place can provide this place of honour and responsibility, where her  influence  and her works will be passed down to others for generations.

God knew what He was doing when he wrote that women should be workers at home, because women have the greatest power in the home. She can manage an entire family and make the workplace to suit herself. She often looks after elderly grandparents while she is training her own children. From home, she reaches her hands out to anyone in need. She develops skills and talents. Her children are taught manners and refinement. Her husband depends on her in many ways.

A Woman's Place is Her Home.  It belongs to her and no one else. When we say a woman's place is the home, it is because of God's word, not because we invented the idea. I mentioned Titus 2 in the New Testament, but there is also Ist Timothy 5:11-15.  Younger widows are also younger women, and both have the same problems if they do not align their lives to these scriptures.  The Old Testament shows Sarah entertaining strangers at almost a moments notice. Her kingdom was her home.  Proverbs 31 has lately been made into a mandate for real estate agents, but in reality, it shows the woman in charge of the home and the family.


40 comments:

Donalacasa said...

This was such a good post! I work from home as a medical transcriptionist in addition to homeschooling my children. I have been struggling lately with keeping up with my transcription production goals. For me, it is like women of old who were weavers, only I am weaving medical reports instead of fabric. But, my children are involved in several activities out of the house and my husband is a diabetic who works an hour away from home. He's got to be able to sit down to a nutritious dinner when he gets here.

Your blog encouraged me that my attempts to maintain balance and be the gate-keeper for my home is not in vain.

Blessings!

Anonymous said...

Dear Lady Lydia!
May I thank you so much for those so precious lines concerning the
place of the Woman in her Home.
This is so true.
Have a Lovely and a Blessed Day!
Maria Laetitia

Anonymous said...

I really enjoyed reading this peice. I am a stay at home homeschooling mom. Sometimes my job seems tedious and tiring, but your article put a fresh thought in my mind about my daily tasks. Thank you for your honest words, words that many are not willing to speak or believe in today's society. We are bombarded by the idea that a woman can only have worth when she works outside the home. Your words show us otherwise and show us the importance of our place in the home watching over the affairs of the family. THANK YOU!!!
Jenn Price
pricefamilyx6@yahoo.com

Anonymous said...

Thank you, Lydia. I have nothing to say... You always say it so graciously.

Kind regards and God bless.

Sonya

DONNA said...

WOW Very enlightening. I really enjoyed this post. It puts things into perspective for a woman. I just came across your blog through someone elses can't remember whose but I am glad that I did. This post was a blessing and one needed at this time in my life. Thank you and God Bless You,
Donna

Motherduck said...

What a lovely summary of Titus 2. Thank you. Could you please tell me how to make a copy of this article? It won't copy and paste like I am used to, so am not sure if you have a suggested way of doing so. Laura

Anonymous said...

It was a blessing to wake up to such an encouraging post! Thank you so much. Now I'm off to do what I do, with a joyful heart!

Marqueta (Mar-kee-ta) G. said...

Dear Lady Lydia,

What a beautiful reminder! Thank you for your on-going encouragement and for all that you are.

Love,

Marqueta

Anonymous said...

Dear ma'am,

Thank you for your thoughtful commentary, "A Woman's Place." I know many young women, through church and family, who think only of competing in the world. They give various reasons: not wasting their expensive college educations, fulfilling their own desires to accomplish something 'important,' maintaining a level of lifestyle, problems with their family's economy, and many other reasons. Having spent many years myself in the world's marketplace, I know how difficult it is to change this way of thinking. Unless one purposes to think otherwise and allow Scripture inform their decisions and choices, the God-ordained role at home will be diminished and set aside as an optional/alternate way of life.

I'm grateful that the Lord sovereignly determined that my health would deteriorate for a season and I would come home to recuperate - - and then stay. Unfortunately, my family suffered for those years that home served primarily as a barracks/boarding house with occassional moments of trying to create the warm, nurturing, God-centered, beautiful environment that all our hearts really craved. Home is now my "place." My husband comes home from a high-stress environment, and it is clear that he considers it to be his haven (Once he didn't think we would be able to "make it" without my income.). My grown children and their families visit often, and it is a joy to see them appreciate and relax in the atmosphere of their old family home (I remember when they couldn't wait to leave every day.). The Lord has indeed blessed me and shown me through circumstances beyond my control - but totally controlled by Him - where I am to be. I do grieve for the lost years when I wasn't walking in obedience , but I am so grateful for few years I have left to honor the Lord and serve Him and my family. Ephesians 5:15-16 (Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.)is often on my mind now.

Home Living is such a rich topic but much neglected. Thank you for stepping in the gap to reach those ladies who do not attend a fellowship where the Titus 2 mandate is taken seriously and for those other sweet ladies who, for other reasons, have never heard these things before. May the Lord richly bless you as you continue to teach ladies of all ages these timeless truths from His Word. Mrs. L from Colorado

Anonymous said...

Thank you for such an encouraging post.

I tell myself this often, just the simple fact that I am here makes a big difference. Even if I am not cooking gourmet meals or keeping the house perfectly clean all of the time, I am here.

~ Ann

Gail said...

When a woman is not allowed to look after her family and home or chooses to neglect these, she inevitably turns her interests outward, to the detriment of her family life.
This creates entanglements and loyalties which eventually make her miserable. And, in my opinion, kind of crazy. Either she becomes so overburdened and overwhelmed that she has the proverbial "meltdown", or she develops some kind of stress-related disease, or ends up as some weird distortion of masculinity. She becomes the office busybody, disrupts a church, engages in character assassination, or in a position of leadership she takes to meddling, overstepping, and running and ruining other people's lives. This is what happens when women are not content to make the home their priority, or are forced into the public world through a husband's will or circumstance. You know, when I was young, I used to take my mother, a highly intelligent and capable woman, to task for not "making more of herself". I thought she should have become a CEO of some company, or a professor, or the head of Social Services. She certainly had the intellect and administrative skills to do those things. But she didn't have the emotional temperament or inclination to do so. And she knew what she could handle (a blessed state, indeed). She was content to run her home so well as to make it seem effortless. She said she had no interest in taking on the affairs and responsibilities of the outside world. So my father never had to wait for his meal or wonder where he could find a clean pair of socks. We children always came home to a clean and inviting house each day from school, with the wonderful smells of supper cooking and coffee perking. In her free time she would visit, or have company, or play cards with her friends. I am so glad she knew what her priorities should be. But today women are confused about that. Now, we have a feminized federal government which has itself become the neurotic, irresponsible, meddling busybody chasing after us all. All aspects of society are being headed by (increasingly crazy) women and the freakish, sissified men who submit to them. It makes me sick.

Lydia said...

I added the rest of my post this morning so be sure to note the additions.

Mrs.L. in Colorado: the greatest blessing can come from illness. I know a woman who wanted to be home but her husband insisted she work. She became very ill and her doctor said she should not go back to work. She thrived at home and her health improved. She never went back to work. Lots of men are sending their wives to work at the risk of their health. Working outside the home is not a womans place. God already gave her a real place and He upholds it with His word. No one can budge her from it if she has a conviction. Our beliefs have to be strong enough to regulate our actions. I have no respect for men who send their wives to work: they are not real men. Real men want their wives to be treated with love and respect, and the home is the only place that a man can enforce that.

Lydia said...

To Emmarinda at 8:30 am,

Your thoughts deserve a lot of commentary.

For one thing, it is true that working women sometimes tend to micromanage everyone in their sphere, wanting to know what they are doing,when they are going to retire, what trips they are taking, and in general, collecting information. The working experience makes it hard for some women to feel important at home and to be content to mind their own business.
The scriptures clearly teach that people are to mind their own business. Home is the one place that is completely a woman's own business, not someone else's business. She should be unshackled to do that business in the freedomm that is needed to do it. She was given power and authority at home. Men should mind their own business by finding ways to provide for their family and women should mind their own business at home. If they use this freedom and authority as it can be used, they can create castles out of cottages and resorts out of tents, by their love and their teaching and their hospitality, their special ways of putting things right.

candy said...

I couldnt agree more! Well said!

God didnt create women to take care of finances by working like a man outside the home. How can people not see that I wonder!


I loved the comment by Emmerinda. It brought tears to my eyes when I read about her Mom...and how her Dad never had to look for a pair of socks, wait for supper etc.

It made me teary because thats me. I do that too and my husband loves it and I love being able to be at home and care for my husband, son, our home.
I cant even IMAGINE life if I had to go to work outside the home. ICK! Its dirty, negative, rough and tough world out there. I dont want to be out in the world working like that. No way!
I'll take my simple little frugal (but cute!) life anyday! Staying home, homeschooling my son, studying the Bible, sewing, having tea, learning from blogs like yours!

Thankful and blessed to be a fulltime homekeeper!

Lydia said...

Donalacasa, there are a lot of ways for women to earn money at home, as long as the family comes first, and it does not take over your life. Country women used to (and still do) have chickens and sell the extra eggs to people who came by. They took in mending and ironing, or they baked bread. The problem lies in trying to make as much money as your husband, which of course, you cant, if you are selling eggs. Women were not created to be wage slaves, but were given a special place.

Anonymous said...

This is a wonderful article! I just want to thank you for continuing to be such an encouragement to women. I love being home with my family and schooling my children. Most of all, I LOVE being a home maker for my family. Your articles remind me of the great importance of the job with which God has blessed me.

Thank you!
~Rhonda

Anonymous said...

A great article, Mrs. Sherman...these are the kinds of posts that bless & encourage so many of us women. Your words are like balm to us. You speak from God's Word, & from the experience of putting into practice what He has said. You speak with courage, articulating things that many other women are afraid to say, or maybe even acknowledge privately. May God bless you.

Brenda

Anonymous said...

I love being a homemaker. Now that the children are grown everyone including my husband, parents, and in-laws are pressuring me to go out and work. I finally talked this out with my husband the other morning. I told him my testimony that God's word says what my work is; it is homemaking--not just child rearing. He finally sees that this is true. I don't think I would have had the conviction of this truth without your witness to give me strength. I've been reading your blog for a few years now. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

BTW-I'm dresses only now for nearly a year. There's no going back for me. I'm a lady.

Anonymous said...

On such a weary day with the latest Washington news in the back of our minds it is so good to be home away form it all and be able to relax in our havens. Turning off the anxiety of the world and being just the family. The comments here have added much to the thoughts in your post. I enjoyed pondering them. I am old enough to remember the days when most women if not all in the neighborhoods were home. It is clear to me the difference it makes. To others younger this is something a bit new but they are learning through wonderful words like those you give us. There is no place like home. Home is where we all want to be and by being home I can create the kind of place my individual family needs to renew their souls and minds and body.

Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for this post. God bless you.
Ana

Anonymous said...

What a tremendous article! I wish the majority of men and women could understand and grasp these truths. It's obvious you spent much time and thought on these wise words and I really thank you. These writings of yours saturated with great teaching are such an inspiration and encouargement. THANK YOU. (And also thanks to the ladies commenting.) L.

Anonymous said...

I do so agree with your lovely post!

I am training my daughters to do this as well...this kind of life has been the joy of my life!

Anonymous said...

I want to share with all of you something that happened to me this afternoon. My older daughter (18) was telling me how many of her friends & acquaintances have stay-at-home mothers. She said she knew of only 2 others besides her own family. That number was surprisingly low, I thought, even in today's world. I was putting the finishing touches on supper, as we waited for my husband to come home. We continued the conversation, as we mused about what it would be like for our family if I weren't a homemaker. Then, same daughter said, "I'm glad you're a stay-at-home mother. I like it that you're here, & we get to eat good meals, & not just frozen stuff."

What can I say, to describe my joy at hearing those words? Somehow, our very worn furniture didn't look quite so shabby, & the fact that our house is not entirely finished didn't seem to matter. I felt so blessed. :o)

Brenda

Anonymous said...

Dear Lydia,

thank you so much for your blog and for obeying the call of the Lord in your life. You are truly a blessing to all of us who have been injured by the world systems.

For the warning and benefit of other women, I will attempt to make two points while sharing my story. One, that women do best if they stay in the home. Two, that home schooled children make better educated and well adjusted adults who are ready to raise their own families, are socially better adjusted to solve world problems then the institutionally "public school" raised child.

I was raised in a home where both grandmothers worked and at a future point a mother in-law who worked.

My mother stayed home and raised my brother and I until my last year of public high school, then she went to work and she and dad divorced three years later.

My father always pressured me to get a job while continuing my education in college after high school. He insisted I become an office secretary and earn "good money".

I didn't want to go to college unless I could take home-economics courses to stay home and be a good wife and mother. The girls I knew who had gone the route of the secretary had all been pressured by their male bosses and co- workers to have sex.

To keep peace in my family I eventually caved to the pressure of my father to go to work, but took courses in nursing education.

After one year of college and being 18 years of age I got married. Two years later my husband and I started a family. During this time I found Christ and made the choice to live for him. My spouse did not make the same choice.

My husband didn't want any more then two children, but I could stay home with them.
Our eldest child began having problems in school and became disinterested. I wanted to home school, but my husband wouldn't allow this because he paid his taxes so they would have a "good education", plus he didn't think I was qualified since I didn't have "certification" to teach. Eventually our family paid big time for this.

I share all this to warn families to allow the women to stay home and home school their children, where their nurturing influence can blossom and they can in turn teach their children to be responsible adults.

As Lydia has mentioned in previous posts it was never God's plan for children to be herded and raised in an institution or for women to be away from the home.

There are all sorts of resources for the family who chooses to home school their children. More so now then any other time.

Gail said...

Vigilance is the word for today. We must be ever at the gates of our home life and our loved ones' hearts.
The direction of your child's life can be turned in the space of an afternoon. If you neglect your marriage or begin to take your husband for granted, beware! And we all know about how weeds and clutter can quickly get the upper hand! If we are home, we are there to attend to these things, physically and spiritually, and hopefully we will be faithful to our duties and learn to really appreciate their importance.

Anonymous said...

I am so blessed by both Lady Lydia's words of wisdom in this special post AND all of these varied comments.

Thank you ladies so much for your thought-provoking words and reminicences of earlier times. My great fear with this state of current affairs in Wash. is that we will be taxed so heavily for the outlandish programs that even children will be forced into the "work-force"..(such a Soviet Union term,too)...in order to have enough money for the family to even survive. But then where will any jobs exist for them and their formerly homekeeping dear mothers???I am so sorry to write so paranoidily, but we are under seige by the revolution of the commnunists even in America now. I hope Lady Lydia can encourage us with a comment on this topic. Gratefully, Lynn

Anonymous said...

My latest "treasure book" I ordered for myself came today. I have been absorbed in it. It is "Bessie Pease Gutmann" by Karen A. Choppa.

The art in it all centers on mothers and children, and it is so special. The artist made a very strong statement about what was most important in life to a woman - home and family. Most of her work was put out between 1910-1940.

This is a very refreshing book for women, and goes right along with your beautiful commentaries. Some of the paintings/drawings have an amazing impact, along with the simple captions the artist chose for her works.

Lydia said...

Thanks for the nice reminder of this wonderful artist. She and Mary Cassatt both portrayed the love of women to the home. I will include some of Besse's paintings in a future post.

To Lynn,

Communism will eat itself up. Its a destructive concept that has never worked. It only destroys. The Bible commands man to replenish the earth. Communist doctrine depletes the earth whereevef it goes. It is unBiblical and based on the writings of Karl Marx, whose deeds live on after him and who is taught in universities world wide. Biblical economics is another matter that should be taught but which people know little of. It is the only thing that brings peace and prosperity: basically a man sells what he produces and keeps his money to buy good from other people for his family. COmmunism taxes that money and then when you spend what is left it taxes what you spent and then it taxes what you bought. You end up working for the government. Several good commpanies have moved out of our state because the state taxed them for making money, and they could not pay their employees. Communists do not bite the hand that feeds them: they cut it off completely so that it may never feed them again.

Anonymous said...

I need to let you know that with all these comments I finally had a light bulb go off...NOW I understand my old miseries about having to go to work after divorcing. I have many years behind me of being very burdened and despressed by the daily need to leave my little home (apt) and put my daughter somewhere and try to make enough money to live on...which I NEVER was able to...my family helping financially from time to time when i really needed it. I always felt like a "looser" because everyone, including my late mother and father, wondered why I was unable to make a success of my work life...now I realize THEY were the problem...not my fears and misgivings about the job places. Thank you all so very much for opening my mind to what ladies really need. A home port to dwell safely and contentedly. Bless you all.
Lynn

Anonymous said...

Lydia,

You touched upon so many crucial areas of influence for a woman in the home. I have often felt like a rock in the river of time, trying to slow down the pace of life for my family and bring them back to what is important.

A woman who insists that everyone sit down together to a meal (and goes to the work of making the meal and getting it to the table regularly and on time) is doing an amazing service to her family. Just think of all the other similar choices that she can make in her home!

Anonymous said...

Lydia,
How can a woman who has not been trained for the home, who has bought into the myth that higher education solves all problems, who has delayed marriage until her thirties, manage to return home? The education debt alone is enough to make one feel no just justified, but obligated to continue working out of the home.
What practical advice can you offer to women who want to switch gears?

Gail said...

To Anonymous 11:28 a.m. - Go to God first and humbly ask Him to show you your next move. He owns everything in the universe and He will supply all your needs, if you are humble and truly wish to follow His will for your life. God forbid that I come across as a "name it and claim it" person, but I can testify that I have asked Him for specific amounts of money to help get out of debt and He has sent it. I do not ever presume anything with the Lord and do not make that a habit by any means, but I just know that He can do anything He wants to do, and if we are doing our part, He will do His. So practically speaking, and I have written on my own blog on this subject quite a bit, I would eliminate any and everything in my life that I can do without, even if temporarily, and then I would start throwing money bombs at the debt, until I conquer it. You would be amazed at what you can do once you get focused. Our dear Lydia has written wonderful posts about what we can do without, such as paper napkins, for example, and there are many good sources of information on housekeeping, here in her blog and elsewhere. One book we like quite a bit is Home Comforts, by Cheryl Mendelson, and there is flylady.net on the web, which can really help you build your routines. And remember, there are many of us who make it a point to pray for the restoration of the home for others.

Lydia said...

I am hoping to get time to post something new today regarding the comment about not having had the practice at home. Many women have worked outside the home for years and need some kind of idea how to get started at home to get their houses where they can function. I hope to cover some of that today.

I think one way to get started is to get the house ready the night before, with a clean kitchen and clean living room. If those two things greet you the next day, you are more likely to start it with a good feeling and that is certainly more motivating.

Anonymous said...

Emmarinda and Lydia,
Thanks for addressing this. I have come to realize I'm happier at home, but I feel like it's hopeless. My student loan debt alone is over 60k. Both my husband and I have prayed and turned to God in this situation, but in the six years we've been together we've made no headway. We've given up all that we can--our second car, a larger apartment, owning a tv, but despite our sacrifices, it seems we are always encountering unexpected expenses. As such, our debt has increased rather than decreased. I'm actually looking for a third job for this summer. I often leave the house at 6am, not to return until after midnight. Of course the house is not a haven. I am home less than my husband. I have no time to manage it. It's funny that you mentioned flylady. I found it about a year ago and it has helped. I am still looking for a resource so I can learn how to cook from scratch, sew, and other home skills. I'm very sorry that sounds like whining. I don't mean to. I have many blessings. Thank you for your time.

Anonymous said...

I sure know that if I am greeted with a sink full of dishes and a cluttered living area when I start the day I feel like I am already a day behind and will never get caught up. A few minutes spent the night before is sooo worth the effort! :) Anna

Anonymous said...

So agree - I've done much better health wise, spiritually, and mentally at home. Life is much more balanced now that I am home taking care of the household.

~Alexandra

Anonymous said...

I enjoyed reading your post. I love your blog and find encouragement when reading it.

Because of reading your blog, and others, I'm starting to understand why I have been feeling like I am beating my head up against a brick wall since entering the work world. I am now entering my late 30's and my biggest desire is to be at home. But, I'm stuck...with ever increasing debt, bills and a student loan on a bachelor's degree that has yet to pay off since earning it 7 years ago. My husband took a lower paying job in my hometown so we could help care for my mom, but that hasn't proven to be a job he's able to advance at. I've pretty much stayed at "entry-level" my whole pathetic "professional" life. I'm heading toward depression and hopelessness. We've put ourselves in a hole....because we thought our plan was better than God's.

If I lose this job I have now, I have already warned my husband, I'm NOT going back to a "career"...no matter how much debt we have. --Maggie

Anonymous said...

Praise the Lord....I lost my job today!!! I'm going to put it into God's hands...He WILL provide!!--Maggie

Anonymous said...

Losing a job or getting sick are doors closed to the world and open to the home.

For the lady who thinks she has to wait til her husband has a change of heart:

Men are indoctrinated with feminism, too, especially religious men. They erroneously believe their wife has to obey them even when they tell them to do something wrong. They think they can keep their wives working so they can have an easier life. But men were made to endure hardness and it makes them better men.

Ministry is a problem because men have claimed ministry as excuses to neglect to support their families and used it as excuses to be away from home while they win the world. There have been many lost, dilinquet children because of absent fathers who claim they love the Lord but neglect the very ministry they were commanded to do: bring up their children in the admonition of the Lord.

Nothing in scripture says that ministry comes first, rather obeying God comes first. Most men are feminists in that they are conceited about the career or position they hold, and want women to support it even if it means give up the woman's true role of house keeping and teaching little children.

If you wait til he changes his mind, you will lose your children.

The Bible says a wife can win her husband by the way she lives. She can quit work and get busy at home and that will be the best teacher of her husband.

No one can force you to go to work. You need to realize that you are not being a feminist if you stick up for yourself and for what is right. It is not being rebellious or feminist to obey God first. The Bible says we must obey God, rather than man. A man has no right to command where God already has. And a man's orders cannot contradict God's.

We need more brave women willing to defy the culture and go back home to save the children.

Anonymous said...

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