by Joshua Hargrave Sams Mann
When summer begins, very young girls are allowed to go to the grocery store in what would have been considered underwear a hundred years ago. Most of these girls do not even know that they are dressed in a way that will attract the worse elements of society and put them in great danger. I wrote previously about the importance of modest dress when trying to protect our daughters, here http://homeliving.blogspot.com/2009/03/protecting-our-daughters-with.html
In the Old Testament, not only was any kind of nakedness (even exposing the thigh was considered nakedness) forbidden, but people were warned not to even look when someone was not dressed modestly or was uncovered.
In the New Testament, women are given special instruction to behave shamefacedly, and dress in modest apparel. Shamefacedness is a type of modest shyness, similar to self-consciousness. It is something that causes you to perhaps pull a shawl a little closer to you in some situations, not wanting undue attention drawn to yourself.
Dress Design from Brown Stone Studio
This same shamefacedness goes beyond modest dress, into modest behavior. One of the most dangerous situations today for young girls is the supposedly innocent fund-raiser called the car-wash.
Parents do not realize why their daughters, dressed in sun-bathing clothing, (short tops and short shorts) are facing traffic and holding up car-wash signs. These girls will attract attention by their immodesty. This is not a shamefaced act; this is a brazen act that will bring more danger to them than you can imagine.
Just this month, on the left-coast of our nation, girls like that are being snatched, pulled into cars, and taken away to be sold in a large city for the purpose of slavery. You may have thought this could only happen in a less advanced nation, but it is happening in the west, as well. Check this link . While some people wait for years for a state legislature to fix such a problem, parents can make such a tragedy non-existent by protecting their daughters.See also
It is important to read the above links before making any kind of assessment about freedom and protection.
We have to quit denying that our daughters are in danger when they are immodestly dressed, and when they are away from home. There is no guaranteed safe place in a public setting unless their parents are with them. There is certainly nothing risky about keeping our children around us. It is better to be safe, than to be sorry. Being protected by the family, does not mean a girl will be locked up in her house. Families go where they please, and daughters are alway safer in public when they are with their own families.
Cruises, colleges, apartments, dorms, and even the workplace, can be places where our precious daughters are in danger. No one wants to admit it, even after seeing the tragic results on the news. I do not even think that a school bus is safe for any child, but people will put their trust in other people to look after their children. There is an old saying that is appropriate here: if you want something done right, it is better to do it yourself. If you want your daughter to be safe, it is better to take care of her yourself, than to put her life in the hands of other people. They just are not as alert and they do not have the natural emotional attachment that makes us protectors of our children.
Protecting our daughters does not mean they will have no freedom or lack of fun. Families can do anything together. Daughters are not safe, even with a group of girls their own age, at a mall. In fact, that attracts more attention. Rarely does anyone "lose" their daughter when she is with the family or with her parents. The family was created to provide the protection that daughters need.
Personally, I see danger even in allowing girls to spend the night at others girls homes, for slumber parties, when there is a low adult/young person ratio.
If daughters cannot go anywhere by themselves safely, what can they do? The answer is not complicated: be accompanied by the parents and family. This provides a perfect opportunity for the mothers to take their rightful places in the daughters lives. They can take them out in the day time to various cultural activities that will also build their character. They can provide a social life within the home atmosphere. They can help them develop good taste in clothing and good standards in style.
Mothers need to be everything that a best friend would be. The great difference is that a mother will have the experience that is necessary to give a caution to their daughters and protect them, something that girlfriends are unable to do. Even if the parents do not provide a social life for their daughters, these young women can learn to be content at home with books and numerous quiet activities which require the use of the imagination.
At the basis of immodesty and unwise independence is a dependence on what others think. We must teach our daughters that their safety is more important than the social approval of others. Young women do not need to think that they cannot wear pretty clothes if they dress modestly. Immodest clothing is not very pretty at all.
They also do not need to fear that they will not have a social life. Families provide a much better social life than friends do. I have kept a guest books over the years, just to see how rich our social life at home was. I am amazed at the hundreds of signatures in these books. They did not come all at once. There were no huge gatherings. There was just enough for our family to enjoy evenings of singing or games. There was just enough to enjoy a meal together. There was just enough to create interesting activities that enriched the young people.
Families also provide better vacations and outings and have more knowledge of the world than young people. Daughters with such families who like to go out have a rich social life without being in danger.
Other families have done this, and today, they can say that their daughters lived in safety. Their daughters did not end up warped for life just because they did not dress in the current immodest attire and hold up a car wash sign. Their daughters did not end up without a personality just because they did not stay up all night partying with friends. These are well adjusted adults who now have families of their own.
We need to take another look at the way we are doing things in this country and to care more about the safety of our daughters than about their social standing with others.
The Pleasant Times is featuring a post about dressing with restraint. There are many new posts up on that blog for the month of June.
See this video about modest clothing.
Here is a link of the story of one woman's harrowing experience which involved two things: immodest dress and being alone without protection of family.
Please read that link.
There will always be those who will say I am advocating something that I am not, and so I will clarify:
I am not saying daughters should have absolutely no freedom, ever.
I am not advocating that people hide their daughters from the world, but that the world does have to go through the proper authorities and guardians before gaining access to these girls. Often girls would like to be protected but their parents are under their own kind of peer pressure to allow their daughters to roam free in public, at younger and younger ages; far too young to be safe.
I am not saying daughters have to be locked up in the house.
I am not saying we should throw a blanket over daughters when we take them out.
I am not saying that daughters should be treated as though they had no rights. Protecting them gives them more rights: the right to live in safety.
I am not saying girls can never go anywhere. There is nothing wrong with going with their families on outings or other places.
I am not saying daughters should not get married.
There are plenty of married women who were brought up within the protection of their parents that are happily married today.
Before jumping to conclusions about what I am saying, please be sure to read ALL the links provided within this article. The U.S. is not a safe place for young women alone. Just click on your news and see who is the current missing person and you will notice it is mostly the young women. There is nothing wrong with keeping these girls protected and alive. When young women are alone and are assaulted, they do not value their rights as much as they value their lives. They would much rather be home and safe, than be out having "freedom" with danger.