Sunday, January 24, 2010

Titus 2:1-8




Tit 2:1 But speak thou the things which become sound doctrine:


Tit 2:2 That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience.

Tit 2:3 The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;

Tit 2:4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,

Tit 2:5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

Tit 2:6 Young men likewise exhort to be sober minded.

Tit 2:7 In all things shewing thyself a pattern of good works: in doctrine shewing uncorruptness, gravity, sincerity,

Tit 2:8 Sound speech, that cannot be condemned; that he that is of the contrary part may be ashamed, having no evil thing to say of you.
 
Your observations about anything in this passage are welcome.

Titus was a Greek convert to Christ, and a companion of the apostle, Paul. This letter, called Titus was written to him while he was in Crete as Paul's representative, and contains instructions on church matters.

 At this point, I must emphasise that these instructions were given to those who had become members of the Lord's church. The teachings were intended for the members of the church. I dont think they were imposed on the society around them. They were specifically for guiding the behaviour of those who had obeyed the gospel.  Christians would be starkly different from the society around them. They would be an example. Their purpose was to draw others to the way of God by the good way they lived. In the church, people were to be the opposite of the world. In the period of time this was written, teachers often taught false doctrines and lead unholy lives. This happens today, too, and that is why this chapter is so important.

Those who are not followers of our Lord will need to look at the teachings of Titus 2 in perspective:  they apply to those who have taken up the cross of Jesus and want to willingly follow him. They apply to those who have turned their back on the way the rest of the world lives and are focusing forward to eternal life in Christ. The unbeliever does not need to protest about the principles that the believers live by. Maybe you are  not really a believer and do not want to follow these instructions to women. No one is going to force it on you. In fact, no one is going to force it on Christian women, either.  Christians believe that followers of God must come to him willingly and whole heartedly.  Believers will not always follow the Word. Some people are in different stages of growth and understanding. Some need to study it some more. There are Christian women who have never really been taught this aspect of their walk with God, or who have never read it in the scriptures for themselves.  While no one will force women in the church to be keepers at home, the older women are instructed to develop certain qualities (listed in the 2nd and 3rd verses), so that they may be qualified to instruct the younger women, the older women  will never force the younger women to do it. They are obligated to teach it, though. So, if you are a Christian woman and you have reservations about Titus 2, there is no reason to be resentful. It is there for your learning, and hopefully before too much time is gone, you will see the joy in it and want to shed the shackles of the workplace and run to the freedom offered in Christ, at home. These teachings just will not apply to some people.


Guardian of Light
by James Lee

 If you are an athiest and you are looking to object to these teachings: they were not directed to you in the first place. They were written to those who had made the decision to leave their old way of life and follow the Lord. They do not apply to you, and you should have no objection to others wanting to raise their daughters this way.

Girls and women who have been saved should be very happy to know that God has provided, through this chapter, a way for them to live.   They are  not left to wonder what they will do,  to follow the dictates of society, or  be confused as to how they can be fulfilled.  They have a responsibility described in this chapter; one that gives them a place of importance.

It seems like the knowledge contained in Titus 2 would be a relief to many women who feel uncertain about what they should do with their lives, or who are being guided by the rest of the world to get a student loan to prepare for a career. The women in the church have been given the privilege of being in charge of the home and the family, to see that it is guided right. No mention of the world's plan for women is contained in this chapter. Just imagine the non-believers doing the opposite, and you will get an idea of the prevailing culture.

  Tit 2:1 But speak thou the things which become sound doctrine:  Sound doctrine is teaching that follows the will of Christ.  You would know when the teachings you hear are not sound, if they are opposite or different from that which is written in the Bible.

Tit 2:2 That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience.  It makes sense that the aged men in the church are instructed to have these qualities.  No one takes a foolish person seriously. One can understand the foolishness in youth, but expects it to be corrected by the time a man is aged.  Our culture is youth-driven, when it should be age-focused, but we need older men to have these qualities listed in this 2nd verse, so that young people will be drawn to them and take them seriously. 

 When you find one of these men, it is a joy to be in his presence and to sit at his feet and listen to him talk. That kind of man has no foolishness and no idle words. He exhibits the stability and soundness of mind that is a result of practicing the instructions to Christians. He is not swayed by modern doctrines, the latest emerging church on the block, or the new hyped up religious activities. His faith is stable and totally in line with the scriptures, he is serious about life, and is able to teach with great patience, what is right and good. In doing so, he can turn many away from their folly, to the right way of living.

This verse seems to have nothing to do with the woman's role in the church, but the next sentence is closely connected to it:

Tit 2:3 The aged women likewise,  If there is one thing women should memorize, it is these four words: the aged women likewise.  Everything the aged men are supposed to be, applies to the aged women. You might say that this is true fairness and true equality in the eyes of GOD, for it is one thing that is required of both men and women. 

 Aged, of course, was usually a reference to anyone the age of threescore, or 60 years old.  That of course does not mean that you should be silly when you are young and expect to suddenly change when you become aged. You reap what you sow, and if you sow careless living all your life, it will be difficult to overcome when you are aged.  However, it is never too late for a person to change and get their life in line with the precepts of the Lord. There are many things that could be discussed regarding these four words: the aged women, likewise!!

that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;  It is obvious that women around them in the culture of the time, did not embrace these teachings, but the main point, I think, is that those who follow the Lord, must, not just because it works or because it is better for them, but because it sets them apart from what the non-believers are doing, and because it shows their obedience to the word of God. 

 These items in Titus 2 are an area in which those converted to our Lord can shine and be distinct, but most importantly, it shows a trust and reliance on the Lord for His provision. It also sets the believer apart from the world, in that she will be home, minding her own business, not out in the working world minding other business, gossipping, snooping, working up jealousies and resentments, going out drinking with the girls, teaching fables and worldly wisdom to others, etc. 

While there is no denying  that many women can make it by working outside the home, the point is, that it is God's special instruction to women who are converted, to set them apart, as followers of His. It is, in a sense, an opportunity to obey and to exercise her faith.

An interesting article here illustrates the world's contempt for the idea of full time wives and mothers and homemakers. But the world's approval or the world's contempt should not make a difference in the mission of the Christian woman to be at home.

Tit 2:4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,   An older woman would need to have a sound mind, unclouded by drinking, gossip, or any other vice, in order to see her way clearly to teaching the younger women. Teaching the younger women to love their husbands involves a careful learning of scriptures, particularly those that teach about love. First Corinthians 13 comes to mind. Younger women need to learn to be patient, kind, and to overlook a fault.  Older women, having already experienced a good marriage and obedient children, need to pass on their knowledge and help make family life easier for the younger ones. They dont have to make the same mistakes, if there is someone older to warn them.  I believe that the word "sober" means not to drink, but also not to behave as though you are drunk, full of ridiculous behaviour, wasting time, or making bad decisions that will effect the home. Being sober means to be serious minded and sensible.

Older women need to teach the younger women how to treat their husbands, and how to teach their children. It is natural for the young to immitate the older, so the older women should be an example of  sober behaviour to the younger.  They should teach young mothers to stay home and raise their own children. These children will learn from their raising, to raise their own children. Young women should tell their children, "I am teaching you this, so that you will be able to teach your own children." It gives them a greater motivation to learn, because they are going to reproduce their learning in the lives of their own children. 

If women want to love their children, they must take charge of them, and not turn them over to the government or to other people to be taught and cared for. If you want to have a compliant child, train that child yourself.  The child needs to learn to follow the teachings of the parents.

God chose parents to raise the children. Dueteronomy 6:6-8 and Ephesians 6, both instruct the parents to teach and nurture the children. There is a growing trend to find nannys for children rather than raise them yourself. One purpose of teaching your own children is for the growth and maturity of the parents. Parents who homeschool will be learning how to teach, and developing parenting skills. If you turn your job over to someone else, you will give up your authority, and then, when you do want to teach something important to your child, the child may be thinking that his parent is not a "real teacher" and that the schools ,or their other guardians,know better.

If  you really love your children, you will not give them their own way all the time, and not let them run the home.  They are to be in a submissive role, obeying,  and this trains them to be good parents.  Then, their role changes: they become the parents and can train their own children.  If you do not teach your children to obey, you do not love them. If you love them, you dont want harm to come to them. A disobedient child gets in all kinds of trouble. A parent can be accused of being "too strict," but  if that child is not taught and not nurtured in the admonitionof the Lord, he will be disciplined further by the agencies of the government. The police will be strict, and so will the courts, when the adult that was not trained in his youth, gets into trouble.  Older women are to teach the younger women to love their children. Love involves personal sacrifice. Do everything in your power to stay home with your children and to homeschool them. Then, even if it does not turn out perfectly the way you envisioned, you will at least have a clear conscience, knowing you followed what was good and right.

Tit 2:5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.  There is much to be explored in this part.  It is easier to be discreet and chaste if one is in a place that encourages it. Home is a refuge from the world's voices to be otherwise. Being home, without the distraction of other people, women do not have the peer pressure to follow the trends of the world.  You increase your chances for success in these other areas, just by staying home.


keepers at home: It seems to be easier to learn to sweep a floor or wash a sink full of dishes, than it does to develop things like patience or soundness in doctrine. Those sort of things take more time and study and sometimes are only developed over a period of time. Housekeeping, and modest dressing, on the other hand, can be changed in very short time.  The scriptures include both the character qualities and the physical efforts of keeping house.  It does take some time to blend the two aspects together. One is physical and the other is more spiritual, but over time, you will see that taking care of a husband and children, and  housekeeping, become a spiritual act of kindness.

The other observation that many older women have, is that in order to really keep the home, you have to be in it, not in someone else's house all day. If you want to train or teach your children, they have to be with you, not somewhere else, during the teachable moments of the day.  If you love your husband, you guard his money and make it benefit him by providing a wonderful home life for him.  It may take some men awhile to appreciate it, but at least the wife will be doing God's will, and in so doing, the entire family is blessed.

That the word of God be not blasphemed:  Adam Clarke, (1762-1832) commented on this phrase, the following:

That the word of God be not blasphemed - The enemies of the Gospel are quick-eyed to spy out imperfections in its professors; and, if they find women professing Christianity living an irregular life, they will not fail to decry the Christian doctrine on this account: “Behold your boasted religion! it professes to reform all things, and its very professors are no better than others! Our heathenism is as good as your Christianity.” These are cutting reproaches; and much they will have to answer for who give cause for these blasphemies."


I thought this, written so many years ago, was interesting, in its emphasis about the shame of giving God's word a bad reptuation by taking it lightly.


The housekeeping aspect of this scripture is huge, and volumes could have been spoken and taught about it over the spans of centuries. Each era would have required different knowledge about housekeeping. Just look at the old housekeeping books from the 18th century: how to make candles, trim the wicks, care for them, etc. or how to wash clothing by hand. Each generation would need different instructions on housekeeping. God wisely told the older women to provide that knowledge to the younger ones, and each era would have its own teachers. 

There could be volumes written on marriage and child rearing. It would take a life time of lessons  to teach younger women the different aspects of marriage or child care. That is why it is so important to keep reading the Bible for yourself, as you glean lesson after lesson that provides the wisdom you need. In doing so, read it with the attitude that if you find something you are not doing that is wise to do, you will do it, and if you find something that you are doing,  that is not wise, you will not do it.  Some times people read the Bible looking for an exception or looking for a way to justify doing something, rather than opening their hearts to what God has to say to them.  The book of Proverbs contains much wisdom about the parent-child relationship. The Bible was written so that the followers of the Lord will have the comfort and the direction they need. Pray that you may  follow it. It is easy to follow the prevailing culture: the doors are always open and the path is wide. It might not seem possible to follow God's word, because it requires more effort, but with each sacrifice you make, comes a huge blessing.







































Please be sure to comment on each verse, if you desire.

95 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is a wonderful passage from the Bible, but could we ever get a preacher to preach it without the chains of political correctness?

Anonymous said...

When you see an older women living as mentioned in the passage she sure stands out in the crowd of women who could not meet this passage. She stands out like a beautiful rose in a snow storm.

Anonymous said...

I am Catholic and as a married homemaker with children, I have reflected on this passage before. I have come to some conclusions about it. First of all, I think that it outlines a way of life that leads to a good outcome. I also think that this simple plan is something that is impossible to do if one also wants to please the secular world as it is today. Everyone who sincerely wants to live out this Bible passage needs to make a consious decision to do so, it will not happen any other way.

Many, many temptations abound and this good, quiet life can probably seem dull at times when compared to what so many others are doing. Again, that is where I think a consious decision (devotion?) to these Christian values needs to be made. This commitment also needs to be renewed daily. It helps to have an example to follow, but if such an example is not present, we can BE that example for someone else and in time, we will see the changes we have made make a difference, in our own small corner of the world.
Humility, patience and faith are all required to live this good life and these virtues need to be nourished by Church attendance, continuing religious education (formal and informal), the friendship of those seeking to live a similiar way, and daily Bible reading.

Carol Conway-Fleisher said...

This is a wonderful passage. I wish their was some way that older women (living as mentioned in the passage) could/would teach younger women like me to live this way.

Laura Spilde said...

This is a wonderful passage. Unfortunately it is ignored so profoundly in some church congregations that they have adopted to select those they see fitting to their needs rather than that which God sees WE need. Because of feminism, many woman have completely lost their spiritual connection.

Anonymous said...

I agree that it is difficult to find a Titus 2 mentor in real life...thank God for the internet!

I also wanted to comment on your daughter's blog---I LOVE the stationery she made! Great idea!

Marcia Wilwerding said...

The older women must obey this command whether the world, her own flesh, the devil, or the younger women like it or not. It is God's chosen way to mold and shape younger Christian believing women into Godly older women who will teach others also. Older women must do it. Younger women must not only accept it, but cherish the godly mentoring of older women. It is God's way to unspeakable blessing in our homes, our churches, in our own society, and in the world our children will have to rear their children in. I look forward to hearing your own commentary, dear friend.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

I do have some observations about the passage and about the lies women have been told today.

Anonymous said...

I am teaching a class for younger women at my church. Sometimes before I teach I think to myself,"These young ladies probably already know all of this. I hope they are not bored." It surprises me almost every time when they all surround me afterwards and tell me how much they learned, How much they loved the class, and to keep it coming.

There are some things that life, time, and God's word that are absorbed into us that we do need to share with the younger women. Unfortunately most have only ungodly television advisers giving them untrue and unproven advice for every situation.

If you do not have a mentor, for goodness' sake, read the Bible and ask the Lord for understanding. Don't follow Hollywood's horrid example!

Emmarinda said...

I am in a weekly bible study at my next-door neighbor's. These are all women from my church, and they are in their 40's, 50's and beyond. This would not be a passage they'd enjoy, if you know what I mean. I once made the statement that women should be submissive to their husbands, just to see the reaction. It was as if I had thrown a piece of bloody meat into a circle of starving coyotes.

Anonymous said...

There needs to be a mutual respect of each station of life. The older women for the younger and the younger for the older. Each must be willing to learn and follow God's written word. So many times I have heard older women act like 'all' younger women don't have any idea how to do things. Like wise I hear a lot of younger women say the older women should mind her own business and times have changed so what does she know anyhow. I often wondered when people like Ann Landers would get so many saying they did not like their mother-in-laws or mothers giving them any advice. Please keep an open mind. They are not trying to change your whole life but to help you not stumble on life's bumps like they might have. To help make your life better. Also your reliance on God stronger. I have been the daughter as well a mother and now as the mother-in-law. I find that trying to be sensitive to others and keeping your mind on how God says we are to treat others makes life work as it was intended. Praying before saying is sometimes needed too! :)

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

I appreciate everyone's comments so much. Please feel free to speak what is really on your heart concerning this. We see that churches have truly deviated from this message, and some of you who are over 60 can remember when it was not so, and when the older women taught the younger women to stay home and to raise their children and keep house. Many childless women also wanted to stay home. The standard of living was much lower (no two-cars, washers, dryers, dishwashers, expensive things), and they did not use the excuse that their husbands did not make enough. The wages were much lower for men, and people did not have as many material goods. Yet the women at church knew that women should stay home and they told it like it was. Today they are so intent on pleasing everyone around them, and pleasing the most liberal ones in the church, that they miss this message--a message that would free their families from the stress of being on the never ending treadmill of working and travelling and getting up early and leaving the home, working, travelling, coming home with very little energy left, etc. I will be leaving further remarks about this passage as I see it, soon.

Anonymous said...

I am 65 and my own mother did not believe in submission to a husband. She once went 'balistic' when it was discussed. I'm wondering if her private school influences were feminist...at what was once a Quaker school in Pa. She did not have tradtional Biblical training nor churching, so she was without a proper guide. So this dismissal of the Bible goes way back in our country.

Anonymous said...

The reason we women were to be keeping at home was so that the Word of God would not be blasphemed. I believe the women leaving the home is why we are seeing/hearing what we are in the churches and even in our nation. I believe "the hand that rocks the cradle (still) rules the world" so to speak and the government isn't a very nurturing hand to rock the cradle. As others, I have often wished to have an older woman near by to mentor me but as I have grown older and see myself more as the pioneer woman doing things on her own and making a path for others to follow. We can be the ones to cause change to happen for the better. :)

Anonymous said...

I honestly wonder if some preachers will not preach on keepers at home because they are afraid the tithes money would go down due to women not bringing in a salary.

Anonymous said...

Maybe this is a place I can ask you what would you suggest to do specifically, in our wonderful role of wife, to bolster a husband's confidence? Because of huge work pressures they sometimes need a lot of support and comfort. It's a jungle out there! Aren't we blessed to have the job of being keepers at home. Maybe with the Bible verses you've shared, we are meant to actually do them. :)

Anonymous said...

I am a recovering feminist, and I'm sure I'm grating on the nerves of my entire family by leaving my high paying professional career to stay home with my children and serve my husband. I hold to these verses, and am comforted by the gentle and happy nature of our life at home now that I'm here full time. I'm often troubled by the argument that a women can be all those things listed in the verses *and* work outside the home. I haven't had to have the argument (blessedly), but I wonder what a proper response would be to that line of reasoning?

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

This passage is absent of the world's cry: you can do it all!

If you do try to work and also follow these scriptures, there will be a conflict. You wont be able to do the job with real concentration and you wear yourself out in your job, leaving not much of you left for the family.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

A young man with vices is not wise, but an aged man with an addiction is crazy.

Anonymous said...

I agree, you cannot possibly 'have it all', nor is there anything biblical to support that attitude. After I commented, and asked the question, I went back and read the verses- it seems clear that we are to 'live out our beliefs', rather than argue. Which is good, because I hate arguing! Thank you for the response. You have been such a support for me during these 2 years of intense change. There are no words to express my thanks...

Anonymous said...

I have noticed that reason a lot of churches do not preach these verses, is they do not practice them at home. Many churches I have attended the pastor's wife worked at least part time outside of the home and the children were sent to public school. A friend went to pastor a church and there was conflict, because his wife stayed home and home schooled their 5 children. Our church is getting further and further from God's standard and into the world's standards.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

regarding the last comment: I thought I was responding to the person who said she was trouled by the teaching that you could have a job and also follow Titus 2. My response was meant to say that Titus 2 seems absent of that worldly teaching that you can do it all. It doesnt give women the whole world to cope with: just their own domain of home and family, marriage or children. Even religious groups sometimes are guilty of teaching women to get jobs outside of the home. They see them trying to live on their husbands income and instead of applauding them and doing what they can to make it successful, or rewarding them, they want to encourage them to work outside the home. I was agreeing with the post from the lady who mentioned the attitude of doing it all.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

Regarding the Stationery: I hope to put a free graphic on this blog sometime in the future, with instructions for making stationery with matching envelopes. Also the stationery she made for her blog is really bright and pretty .

Anonymous said...

Perhaps the reason some churches do not preach about women staying at home is because they fear women will leave church altogether. I honestly think a number of women in my church who work would do such a thing.

If women cannot find good examples to follow, they can certainly take a look at the bad examples all around them and do the opposite. Bad examples can be teachers, too. Look at the paths the bad examples took and choose a different one.

Anonymous said...

I've heard the argument made by women that they are "helping" their husband by working. But in the vast majority of the cases, the man admits he does not return the favor by helping her in the home. Most men have no desire to do the home chores that women traditionally have done.

Regarding pastor wives working, I've had a pastor get very angry when I mentioned that I thought women should be keepers at home. His wife had been working for many years. No pastor will argue with the instructions to love the husband, love the children, be chaste, etc., but when they get to keepers at home, they interpret it wrong.

Anonymous said...

The corollary to verse 5 is this: God's word is blasphemed if we are *not* discrete, keepers at home, good,and obedient to husbands. The world and most of the church really, really dislike this! But they miss something very important, especially with the "keepers at home" part. They don't understand that women are given the high and noble charge of "keeping", a word which can also mean "guarding" the home. We are guardians of our family cultures, preserving the memory of our ancestors and passing along their history and values; and of the Christian faith, guarding and protecting it so that it will not be lost in the sea of secular thought we are all awash in. We are in charge of the entire home economy on which any nation is based. There is no end to what we can do at home, and to how much we can strengthen our families, extended families, and friends, and thus expand our influence beyond the four walls of our homes. We can guard and protect our family finances, our family's health and emotional well-being; we can provide a sound education for our children; we can volunteer in the community to help the less fortunate...But the church by and large frowns on women being keepers at home. I think some of the other commenters may be correct, that often the pastor fails to preach on this because if women don't work, there will be less money in the collection plate! Sad.

But, ladies, be strong! Ask God to enlarge your vision on how you can build up your home and make it stronger and more vital.

Many times I hear of working wives being praised for their excellent organizational skills which make it so they can "do both"(work and manage the home well.)I don't mean to sound harsh, but I don't think this is realistic or logical thinking. If a woman is so organized and efficient that she can split her energy that way and appear successful in both realms, how much more powerful would she be at home, if she were pouring all her resources there, instead of watering someone else's garden?

Lydia, as usual, thanks for your blog and for the chance to discuss things like this.

Anonymous said...

That is a good point: people do agree with the parts not under attack, like loving the husband or the children. They have a conflict over the scriptures where society is tugging at the woman. In this case, they want them for the workplace. I do wonder why so many men cannot find work, but their wives can! There is work out there. Men have difficulty finding employment, yet employers have jobs open only for women? I believe men could do a lot of those jobs, but they have been turned into women's jobs. Charles Dickens wrote several characters of men who were secretaries, or bank clerks, waiters, and shop owners. Yet today , most of those jobs are considered for women only. This doesnt make sense. It leaves a large population of men unemployed. I have seen men out of work, looking for jobs. In the meantime, they send their wives to work. Why not take the job their wife found? Because there are no equal rights for men. They cant hve just any job.

Anonymous said...

Preachers wives working is like a slap in the face to the local congregation that hired him. These people sacrifice to make a contribution to the Lord's work so that he may have a salary, yet his wife works. It says "You dont pay us enough." Preachers wives used to stay home , and keep house, entertain, and were happy, way back in the day before there were such high salaries for preachers. They were intent on being an example.

Anonymous said...

No one will preach about the women staying home because they see how the women are and dont want to correct them . It will insult the husbands, who arent providing for the families, but staying home and waiting for checks in the mail. It will insult the women who are neglecting their homes in order to work. It was, after all, written to members of the Lord's body, not to the people outside of that body, but the members of the church are not obeying it. They want to be like the world. There are lots of ways to make money in the home, that doesnt require great neglect . You can make a money online, without even handling product, without having to deliver things. That is the way a lot of business is being conducted these days. So really, a woman has no excuse.

Anonymous said...

Such a good post, & so many thoughtful (and thought-provoking!) comments that followed. I agree that we(the church)are very guilty of allowing ourselves to be influenced by the world, & taking on characteristics that are unattractive, unhelpful, & unwholsome.

I will never tell my daughters that they can "have it all." What a lie! Nobody, man or woman, can have it all; I believe it's selfish to try, hurting the very people we claim we love most.

We have become a culture that fears anything that looks to be too ordinary, repetitive, or inconspicuous. Mothering & homemaking often have many days that could be described this way. And so....that makes it an unworthy goal for a woman? This disdain that is shown for those who want to pursue homemaking is unbelieveable at times. They are accused of "flying below the radar" or something.

Please keep these kinds of articles coming, Mrs. Sherman. You are reaching so many....influencing lives for the good....perhaps saving families from the brink of disaster.

most sincerely,
Brenda

Anonymous said...

If someone doesn't agree with God's word, then he has reason to question whether he is a Christian at all.

Please remember, true Christian ladies, that there are many unregenerate worldlings in the churches and in the pulpits. They are wolves in sheep's clothing.

They have not repented of doing what's right in their own eyes any more than an atheist has, with the added deceit of pretending to be Christians. But they are powerless to prevent you from obeying God.

I feel it's important to memorize the Scriptures that are under attack today. When some hypocrite (or Biblically-ignorant Christian brother or sister) tells you what "man sez" (wife must work outside the home to "help her husband," wife "should be able" to do it all, etc.), gently and kindly (but firmly and matter-of-factly) counter with what God says, "...young women [are] to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed."

And don't forget how the Titus Chapter 2 ends: "These things speak, and exhort, and rebuke with all authority. Let no man despise thee."

GentleDove

Anonymous said...

I have been the keeper of our home for most of my 41 yrs of marriage to the same man.

What I have said to my husband to bolster his confidence is to acknowledge his efforts(be honest about this),compliment and thank him for being the problem fixer, the bread winner, the comforter, the only one who makes me feel feminine, and anything else I can find to compliment him on or thank him for. Everyone needs this.

Men are strong in physical strength, but their weak spot is their confidence. They need feedback on their efforts. If we as their wives and best friends share with them compliments and gratitude for the little things they do it will build confidence in them. My husband loves to come home after working in the world. It is comforting to him.

So many times I have seen on tv or heard disgruntled selfish women and Hollywood make fun of men and belittle them as fools, idiots and selfish pigs, it makes me ill.

Years ago when I was a young wife some neighbor women would get together and ivite me to Coffeeclatch. I called it husbands are stupid parties or gossip sessions.
They would start griping about their husbands and knock everything about them. Before I knew it I was chiming in with them and the relationship with my own husband started to go sour.

My experience has been to stop listening to them and do what the bible tells me to do. I am respected for this and my husband feels safe around me. He knows our home is a haven.
If you act respectful towards others they will most likely be respectful back.

I guard our home and don't invite or allow foolish, foul mouthed, ill tempered, devious or untrustworth people in my home.

Avoid gossip. It has ruined many relationships. One must never kiss-and-tell about private matters of a relationship between husbands and wives or anything private about your children. These are ways a woman tears down her house with her own hands.

Thank you Lydia for your kindness in allowing this blog, I have enjoyed it so much and even at 60 yrs. old, I am still learning. :)

Anonymous said...

I just wanted to add that it's like Paul knew Titus was going to be critiqued and despised for preaching God's truth.

Don't expect the world to ever approve of homekeeping for God's glory. The world despises God's glory, and if you're doing it right, then the world will despise you, too.

But you will have pleased God, and your fellow (actual) Christians will love you and support you. They might even become a bit bolder in living for Christ, and take their lights out from under those bushels!

GentleDove

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

To anyone who wants to post about how they coped without following Titus 2, I would just like to say thank you for your post. However,on this thread, I am trying to reinforce the workability of Titus 2 and not offer a lot of alternatives to it. I want to hear how it can be done. In past sposts, I've heard from single women in the past who managed to stay home and homeschool their children, despite opposition, and I've heard from unmarried women who stayed home with their parents til they were married, as well as widows. All these women offered great inspiration for how you could carry out Titus 2 and be cared for without violating it. This is the kind of thing I am looking for. I dont want examples of women who didnt follow it. That could be maybe saved for another post? I dont mean to hurt anyones feelings. I just dont think those posts go with this subject right now.

Anonymous said...

One must train oneself to stay at home if one has been working. I found this a hard transition, but I was determined to obey Titus 2. My husband had a good job, but I found it lonely staying home. It was an adjustment I was glad I made, because it made it easier when I had my first child. I have noticed that young women with their first baby find the "staying at home" harder to deal with than a first baby. If you are a young wife without children yet, try to make the transition now.

Anonymous said...

I like the comment by the anonymous commenter who has been married 41 years. It is nice to hear from women of her age.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

I added some more of my comments on those verses, in the original post.

Anonymous said...

Great article! Two quick thoughts:

- One of the inevitable facets of Marxism is the "Cult of Youth". You can tell a society under its sway by its obsession with youth, physical strength, and surface beauty. Age becomes a thing of horror, to be avoided and feared.

- I recently ran across an article by a female psychologist purporting to explain to men "why your wife REALLY wants to stay home." It was basically a tirade about how homemakers are, among some very unprofessional pejoratives, not developing our identities and prefer not to. I suspect that a Christian should find the idea of identity-in-wagework quite foreign and bizarre. The Greatest Commandment, after all, is not "Go thou and earn thy daily wage", is it?

Anonymous said...

The first year at home can be an adjustment, especially if you left a big family where there is something filling the day. This is one reason it is so important to have a good relationship with your parents and siblings. They come over and help with dinner, and they encourage you to sew and to create, and to make a nice home. The first year at home can be lonely but it can be filled with activity. Women actually learn to make work for themselves if they feel they dont have enough to do. Its good for them to be resourceful and think of what to do all day. IT is better than having your work dictated to you by a corporation outside the home.

Anonymous said...

The pastor at the church I used to attend is paid over $50K per year plus rent-free use of the parsonage by his congregation. While this is not a huge amount in a high cost-of-living area, there is no reason why it would be impossible to support himself and his wife with this amount (they had two grown sons not living at home). Yet his wife worked part-time. Because a pastor's wife has so little to do? I don't think so! No, just disobedience to God's word for no good reason whatever. Almost all the wives in that congregation worked outside the home. All kinds of problems and divorce and losing their children (to the world) there.

Anonymous said...

Another thing which is extremely common and popular is for young, new wives to work outside the home to support their husbands, while their husbands go to seminary full-time. Usually the women are on birth-control pills to keep from having children so that she will be able to work like a man, taking no time off for family, to make the most amount of money she can. I am completely against this practice. They should put off starting their family until the husband can support his wife, however humbly. Glad this is anonymous! :-)

Anonymous said...

Yes thanks to the lady who has been married for 41yrs for sharing her thoughts and experience. Thank you too Lydia for encouraging this enlightening discussion.

Anonymous said...

To the lady that wrote about the psychology behind women staying at home: they always have to bring up the idea of identity, so that people will feel that a woman at home has no identity and is a half wit. Indeed, the stay at home wife and mother has protection from the peer pressure of the world, and often people will accuse them of hiding from the world. If a girl does not want to go to college, they say she is inside her shell and that she doesnt want to face life. However the opposite is true: girls often do not want to face the life of being a mother or a homemaker. It is a life of selfless responsibility. It is for the betterment of others and it is a character building experience. It is also an act of faith.

Anonymous said...

I've seen a lot of interesting stuff on blogs about young ladies staying home until marriage. In my generation, this was common among working-class, and especially ethnic working-class, girls. I married at 17, right out of my father's home into my husband's home. I think this made it easy for me to submit to my husband (although I am naturally submissive, not the strong choleric type). I have found that many young ladies who have been on their own before marriage have a hard time submitting to a husband.

It is also hard for wives to submit to their husbands if they are smarter than their husbands (this happens), older than their husbands (not that this is wrong by any means), or if they have been spoiled by their fathers.

Anonymous said...

As a pastor/preacher's wife, I find the negative comments about preachers very hurtful. I resent the implication that if church people do not live godly Biblical lives, it is the preacher's fault.

Not every preacher is a money-grubber. If the preacher in your church is a money-grubber, or won't preach the Bible for fear of losing money, GET OUT OF THERE!

For every preacher who has a large church and a princely salary with great benefits, there are ten who, like my husband who gets $640 per month from his church and couldn't pastor full-time if he didn't have a retirement income that he earned, get very little in the way of monetary support, and would preach/pastor for no support if need be. But, the churches of the first kind fill up with people who then resent the big salary the pastor gets. I find this incredible. Why do people go to those churches if they find the pastor unworthy?

Anonymous said...

I'll continue with my last comment about the preachers.

Why is it assumed that if a preacher preaches about Biblical living, the church members will eagerly RUN out and do what he says? Unfortunately, they almost never do.

My husband used to be the interim pastor of a church about 40 miles from our home. He received $127 per week in support, plus each Sunday a church family would sign up to take our family home for dinner the following week.

Well, one week, my husband preached on Christian wives being keepers at home. He got a chilly reception after church from everybody. He looked on the sign-up roster and noticed that nobody had signed up to take us home the following week. That was his "punishment." Not one woman decided to stay home instead of working outside the home after his sermon. NOT ONE!

Anonymous said...

God bless the pastor's wife who shared what happened when her husband preached on women being at home. My heart goes out to them. If only there were more pastors willing to preach the truth! I am sure there are many reasons that pastors don't preach on this topic; I don't think anyone here meant to express negativity against pastors like her husband.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

I think maybe the members of the church that these instructions were meant for, may have been first generation Christians. Many of the women may have been Greek converts, and may not have known a thing about the Jewish Mosaical Law or the instructions to women in Proverbs. It is possible to change, even if you have not been taught in your youth. These people would have received this instruction for the very first time. Can you imagine the picture they developed in their minds, of what a Christian man and a Christian woman should be like? Perhaps they looked out at the street and observed how women and men in the world behaved: truce breakers, drinkers of much wine, impatient. THen they may have reflected on the teachings that Titus delivered to them and seen the contrast. The contrast is this: while the prevailing culture does NOT do these things, the men and women of God are definitely to DO these things.

Anonymous said...

I'm a single mother that has been able to remain at home after a divorce. I am completely convinced that being a keeper at home is a command from Scripture, and it's best for my children for me to be home, especially after a divorce. It's been hard, but I hang on as I trust in the Lord to provide. (I do work from home also.)

I have realized over the years that most Christian moms who work feel like they are providing for their children, and are being a good parent by working--they are not being feminists. They do need to be taught otherwise, but not many are teaching them. This is a huge problem in many churches today. Christians also are not studying their Bibles.

Anonymous said...

As with so many 'tricky' parts of our christian walk, this is another difficult part of it. Many christians 'talk the talk, but cannot walk the walk. Being a christian means to enter by the narrow gate, and most of the ladies are correct in their comments. If we had clear teaching from the pulpit, it would certainly be easier for us christian ladies, because then we would have clearly defined teaching and the others would at least begrudgingly admit to the doctrine and not persecute their fellow christians. But that seems to be the plight of our times, very few pastors are courageous enough, and this is across all denominations. I now see a remnant of women that are determined to follow God's will for them and their families and it is they that are the courageous ones and I commend them, as they glorify God. How wonderful is that! I have been married for 40 years to a wonderful christian man. Together we raised 8 children and homeschooled. I have found that in our circle it is money that is at the root of going out to work. We must have what others have (or else I'm deprived??)even though some have expressed different opinions on why it is necessary for them to work, after 40 years of observation it is money that is at the root of it all. It is also now creeping into our own family especially in the female in-laws. I can only trust in God. This blog is a beacon of light in this world. Thank you Lady Lydia.

Anonymous said...

There is one true Titus 2 lady in my church. She teaches a Sunday school class and was the ladies Bible study teacher. A humble and sweet lady, she taught a lesson about Biblical modesty and femininity and was yelled(!) at and harshly condemned by the women there. The Pastor would not defend her and she resigned from the ladies meeting. What a great loss. I can still talk to her one-on-one and she is a great blessing to me. I call her my spiritual mother. We are of different opinions on headcovering but she smiled when I informed her that she is the only woman in the church who says she believes a woman's hair is her covering who actually has hair long enough to cover her (most have hair that cannot even cover their necks.)
Lady Lydia, I am curious if you think the "red hats" have anything to do with the lack of Titus 2 teaching/living?
ESM

Anonymous said...

I posted the comment about the psychologist's rant (which, in reflection, I don't care to call an "article" anymore).

The danger of pursuing one's "identity" through employment is that you become dependent on it--and then, when it's gone, who are you? That's self-defeating in many senses of the word.

Anonymous said...

Wow, that is so sad about the woman that ESM wrote about who was yelled at for teaching about modesty.

The same thing happened to me. I am the pastor's wife whose husband was "punished" for preaching that wives should be keepers at home.

We once pastored a church that we started in our home, and then moved to a storefront. I was concerned that the youth pastor's wife and the Sunday School teacher, both of whom would also occasionally minister on the platform for music, would show up in shorts for church, plus sleveless low cut blouses.

I asked them if they couldn't please wear jeans to church instead, and got accused of being "formal." Jeans are formal? I was concerned because they had leadership positions in the church. They were 10 years younger than I.

From that point on, they were out to "get" me. The Sunday School teacher began wearing even MORE immodest clothing than before; the youth pastor's wife showed up in an evening gown the next Sunday, which really looked silly in a storefront church.

They began to watch me like a hawk to the point where I felt like I was in junior high again: if my slip was showing a half-inch, it was, "Oh, YOU'RE immodest now!"

This was immaturity. Most of the people in that church were young.

I confess that I've never had the courage to say anything to any woman ever again about her clothing or working.

I would like to hear from those out there who have been successful at this, and how they did it.

Anonymous said...

I notice from the passage that soundness of doctrine is something that should be taught from older woman to younger. Perhaps catechisms are not just for children! Many adults do not know what they should believe on key doctrines of the church.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

You are right: it is not about identity or about rights, or about expression or fulfillment. These days it is about money.

If a woman wants something bad enough, (good or bad)she usually can figure out a way to get it.

Some women will test God in the right way, and some will test God in the wrong way. One way of testing God's word is to act upon His directions and instructions contained in His word, the Bible and live it, despite the pressures and the persecution. Some will try it and see if it "works" and then quit when it doesnt live up to their own ideas. Others will live it and eventually reap the rewards of a beautiful homelife.

Thank you to the single mom who stays home. That was the whole purpose of alimony, in the old days. If a divorce occured, a man would have to pay a living to her because it was understood that by divorcing her, she would lose his monetary support. Therefore, the courts always awarded her. Now, the courts send the ex wife to work and subtract her salary from the alimony. This is unfair to women.

Other women will test the Lord in a very strange way. A woman I knew had been thinking about quitting work and letting her husband be the breadwinner. Her earnings were more than his, and in a sense, had made him weak. He knew he could fall back on his wife's salary and that she was really the breadwinner, so he was not trying as hard as he could, to earn a living. She said she didnt want to go to work. She would pray that God would prevent her from going to work, but the next day, she would get up and go to work, and and God didnt stop her, so she said it must be a sign that God wanted her to work.

This is a kind of erroneous thinking that has been going on in people's heads for a long time. A man wants to stop smoking, and prays to God that he can quit. but he keeps pulling cigarettes from a pack and smoking them. He said if God didnt want him to smoke, he would prevent him.

People pray they can lose weight or quit eating sugar and breads,etc. Then they find it is easy to find sweets, adn that friends are always offerring them sweets. Does that mean that God wants them to continue to eat things that harm their health? Just because the path to something is easy, does not mean it is God's direction.

God today commands that everyone repent. That means to turn in a different direction. He wont snatch a cigarette from someone's mouth. He wants that person to stop smoking, from a deep inner conviction and a determination.

You cant insist that God become a tyrant who forces you to do right. You have to do it voluntarily. Then it beomes a different relationship. If you do it grudgingly it is not the same thing. My point is that a person has to have a belief about the home, and not just go the way which the world makes easy. Just because something is easy or available, does not mean it is a sign from God. The sign from God is right there in the scriptures.

Have you ever noticed how EASY it is for a woman to find a job? Men can look for months and find nothing, but women find a job quickly. They want women in the work force, and they make it easy for them to find work. Men could have a lot of those jobs, but they are not offered to men.

Anonymous said...

To the preacher's wife: I'm so sorry your husband was subjected to such un-Christian treatment after preaching God's word about wives keeping the home. It's true that many preachers have difficulty finding a flock to lead through God's word because of their rebelliousness. I do feel it's important for the men also to understand that wives staying home means he is in charge of providing for the family. Men and women have complementary roles. You can't teach one without the other. It would be extrememly difficult in a congregation of both men and women feminists to stand all alone on the word of God and try to teach a stiff-necked people. Sometimes, after trying to win people to God, and examining/correcting himself for sin or any unnecessary obnoxiousness, a pastor has to kick the dust from his feet and find some other people who will listen and care about what God has to say in His word. I personally have felt the sting of feminist men who seem to feel comfortable throwing their wives and daughters to the wolves. Rebellion toward God's word is ugly and disheartening but it will pass away. Obeying God's word leads to such a beautiful and fulfilling life, and it is eternal.

Anonymous said...

Many people think they are Christians and go to church to hear their compromised views reflected back to them from the pulpit. They don't really like the word of God, and if they knew they couldn't be Christians without repentence for their sin, they would stop pretending to be Christians. They would just admit that they don't like the Bible and don't want to obey God. It's cruel to give people false assurance of salvation by pandering to their sin and defection from God.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

That is true. I also noticed that the apostle Paul began straightening up the older people first, with instructions on how they were to behave, so that they COULD teach the younger ones. If you are younger and cant find the older people trying to follow this mandante in Titus 2, just start doing it yourself and by the time you are older, you will be qualified. Everyone is older than someone, anyway, and each person is to be an example to others. It doesnt hurt a younger person to practice these instructions to older people. An older child in the family could help his younger brothers and sisters to develop good character, if he was taught to behave this way.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for this post. It gives me a different perspective on this issue. I am a wife and mother working at keeping my home but I am often frustrated with the pressures that come to do otherwise and wish that the outside pressure would change. It's encouraging to understand that this is not new to our generation! This is our job (a commandment really)....to show the world a different way.

Anonymous said...

I teach the 7th-9th grade Sunday school class. One of the girl's complained that her teacher made fun of her for "having her belly hanging out". Upon further questioning, I found out the girl's shirt was so tight and short that she could not even sit still in class without exposing her bare midsection. I smiled and told her that the teacher was not in the wrong-she was and if she wore properly fitting clothes that she could reach up her arms with and show nothing- she would not have to worry about that kind of comment.
I make a point of complimenting the girls when they wear something modest and pretty, it seems to encourage them.

Anonymous said...

Would somebody please elaborate on the red-hat club thing? I saw one commenter mention it here and have been wondering what it is all about.

Yes, perhaps complimenting a younger lady when she is dressed modestly and femininely would be good, as long as you didn't go overboard and make her feel self-conscious.

Yes, we can start being examples, anyhow, even if nobody listens or follows.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

I do not know why the Red Hat Society was brought in to this discussion. They are ladies over the age of 50 who wear red hats to events together. They get their red hat and purple dress ideas from a poem called "When I am old, I shall wear purple."

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

To the lady who wrote a long post about Proverbs 31: As that is a completely different scripture, I was not going to get into it here until I had finished with Titus 2 discussion. The Titus letter was written to instruct the people that had been converted to Christianity. By then, the gospel was being preached to Gentiles, or those outside of the Jewish community. They were also likely to have been first generation Christians. If they were not formerly Jews, they may have had no knowledge of the Proverbs or the Proverbs 31 woman. The apostle gives this new instruction to the new churches. It may have been the first time that Christian wome ever heard of any thing like this. Many of them could have come from a pagan religon, or from following the prevailing culture. The Titus letter would have been a great message to the new church of our Lord, telling them how to behave as Christian men and women, so that the New Covenant would not be dispised. These are some things to think about, but whether or not they knew about the Proverbs 31 woman, the Titus two instruction was for New Testament Christians and for a new age, and they are sufficient.

Anonymous said...

The cat's out of the bag just a little more in Australia; Kevin Rudd and Julia Gillard (our Prime Minister and Deputy Prime Minister) have been banging on about the need to create a more productive Australian ecconomy/society again; this is the beginning of a concerted drive to all but force women back to work and their children into childcare here; I dare say that within the decade, it will be manditory for women to work and children to be placed into institutional care (due to the fact every woman not working is a woman not paying tax to feed the social services machine of the Aust. government) from the earliest age, if not part-time, then full-time.

What counsel do you have for women who live in nations where the govt. oversteps its reach concerning the family? the Scandinavian states are one example; the UK is growing steadily worse and in Germany homeschooling parents have either had to flee to the US if funds allow, have lost their children to the state or have been forced to place their children in state run schooling (the HSLDA website international news page is a litany of sorrow and heartache as family after family have suffered at the hands of the state (mostly in europe); France is looking at this avenue and in several Australian states homeschooled children must attend classes in their local public school for a fixed monthly duration for socialization'.

Give thanks for your freedom because, before you know it, they'll take it away in a heartbeat!

Furthermore, 99.999999% of the churches here don't preach on this type of thing, on home-making and keeping at home; across the board, no matter how conservative. I've only ever heard one sermon where this has been covered and the junior minister has not received encouragement upon this, to say the least; even the most elderly of ladies applaud the professional achievements of their now boomer adult daughters! One cannot speak otherwise. The last 20-30 years have been utterly transformative upon the family; I dread to think what the next 10-20 years will reveal and fear gravely for my newborn little niece; what type of world she will be raised in.

Anonymous said...

"Men can look for months and find nothing, but women find a job quickly. "

Right. When was the last time you saw a man behind the desk at a doctor's office? I don't know that I have ever. Clerical jobs are almost always female. A lot of healthcare jobs are too. You rarely see male dental hygienist or medical assistants. People have come to view office jobs as feminine I think.

Anonymous said...

I mentioned red hatters because, in our church, they are the same ones who are rather feminist in their beliefs and here all of them work full time outside of the home. I was not specifically trying to impugn that group, just wondering if it was a related issue.

MaggierRaye said...

I really appreciate what you said about Christians not looking like the society around them...oh that this were the case today...as a single mom determined to be and to train my daughter to be a keeper-at-home, I'm encouraged to see articles like this one.

Anonymous said...

Titus 2:1-Speak with error-free and wholesome teaching.
2:2- Older men are to be serious, thoughtful, honorable, self-controlled, have a strong faith, possess brotherly love, and be patient and steadfast.
2:3- Ditto for older ladies. Additionally,they need to be reverent, not spread false rumours, teaches good things about God and the duties of people.
2:3- Teach younger women to be friends and companions to their husbands and be affectionate with their children.
2:4-Younger women are to be self-controlled, modest and pure, take care of the house, be useful and pleasant,and be their husband's executive officer, so that the mind and will of God is not spoken of with evil words.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

I see what you are getting at, regarding the Red Hat Society. What began as a ladies tea group, grew into something a little more worldly than women were expecting. I love tea groups and think they are a great opportunity for women to get together and discuss like-values. It would be nice if church women would show hospitality to the younger ones and put some brightness into their lives. It really is fun to go to someone else's house and do something festive. The Red Hatters do allow other ages in their group, but it was mostly for women over the age of 60. I think if you were 50 you could go, but had to wear a pink hat. These groups were really supportive of the tea rooms and civic events and could be seen everywhere. I did appreciate that they were dressed up and looked a lot more dignified than the typical look of the older women--sweat pants and tee shirts with spikey hair, which is very unfeminine and not a good example to the young.

Anonymous said...

Red Hatters do tend to be more feministic women

L said...

We single homeschooling mommas are out there staying home, homeschooling, home business, home everything and loving it. Being home rocks and is a fabulous blessing from God.

Anonymous said...

Here is a biblical commentary

Titus, CHAPTER II.

Ver. 1. Sound doctrine. It is not sufficient to teach sound doctrine, says St. Jerome, if it be not at the same time taught in a manner worthy of itself; that is, if he who teaches it by his words belies it in his actions. (St. Jerome)

Ver. 2. Be sober. The Greek Fathers, Theodoret, and Theophylactus, translate the word, sober, attentive, or vigilant. But Latin interpreters understand it of sobriety, in the literal meaning of the word. Old men oftentimes under pretense of weakness, drink wine to excess. The ancients called wine the milk of old men; hence aquilœ senectus has passed into a proverb, to designate an old man who drinks much and eats little. (Calmet)

Ver. 3. In holy attire.[1] See 1 Timothy ii. 9. The Greek word is sometimes used to signify the whole constitution, or state of a man's health in all the parts of his body: here it is taken for a woman's whole exterior carriage, her gait, gesture, looks, discourse, dress, that nothing appear but what is edifying. (Witham)

Ver. 4. Love their husbands. This is the first lesson he wishes to be given to young women; that they should always manifest a love, an attachment, respect and obedience to their husbands. But it must be a chaste love. Vult eas amare viros suos castè; vult inter virum et mulierem esse pudicam dilectionem. (St. Jerome)

Ver. 5. Discreet, chaste, sober. In the Greek is nothing for sober. The Latin interpreter seems to have added it, as another signification of one of the Greek words. See 1 Timothy iii. 2. (Witham)

Ver. 7. In gravity: to which is added in the Protestant translation sincerity,[2] from some Greek copies; but it is left out by Dr. Wells, as being not in the best Greek manuscripts nor is it in the Amsterdam edition, (1711.) (Witham)

I added this because I liked the part about no murmuring:

Ver. 9. Servants to be obedient. Servants owe respect and submission to their masters in every thing not contrary to the law, or the will of God. Hence they are strictly forbidden to murmur at their commands, to show any repugnance to obey them, or to censure their conduct. To avoid these evils, they ought to consider their masters as Jesus Christ himself, and their commands as those of God himself: which St. Paul often inculcates in other places in his epistles. (Ephesians vi. 5, 6.; Colossians iii. 23.) (St. Jerome)

Anonymous said...

Younger women are to be taught to love their husbands and children. When you love something or someone, you take care of them. We older ones are to train the younger ones to take care of their husbands and children.

Anonymous said...

My father, born in 1915, remembers that women went to work outside the home to help in the war effort of the 1940's, and never returned to the home. I was born in the early 1950's, and remember about half of the wives (my friends' mothers) working outside the home as soon as the children were in school. My mother worked and my mother-in-law worked. During the baby-boom, teachers were begged to come back to teaching, as the school were burgeoning with children. That brought a lot of women back into the work-force, too. This has been going on for a long time. It's time to reverse the trend.

Anonymous said...

Dear Lady Lydia,
You wrote something along the lines of "It is possible to change, even if you were not taught in your youth." I completely agree- I was reared to be a self-sufficient feminist and so I was for years. I spent 20 years in the Marine Corps and even spent a couple of years as a drill instructor. Four years before I retired, a church lady taught us a class about Titus 2. At first I was angry and offended, but I asked her for a copy of her notes and studied on my own and found out she was right and I had some serious changes to make. I started studying the Bible more intently, reading Ladies Against Feminism articles and your blog and other similar sites. By the grace of God, eight years later, I was recently called a Titus 2 lady (believe me, I have a long way to go to actually get there but I have come far).

Anonymous said...

The Red Hat Society ladies are more feministic because their clarion call is "now that we're old we can do whatever we want--it's 'me-time'". Instead of an older age being wiser and sharing that (godly) wisdom, a time to continue to invest in their children's and grandchildren's lives, rather it's about being selfish and doing all the rebellious things they always wanted to do but couldn't because they were "chained" by the ties that bind (husband and children). I, as a Christian lady, intend to avoid this group and mindset as I grow older.

Anonymous said...

Here's the LAF article on the Red Hat Society:
http://www.ladiesagainstfeminism.com/artman/publish/Biblical_Womanhood_and_Christian_Living_14/The_Red_Hat_Phenomenon_15771001577.shtml

Anonymous said...

Marine Corps lady -- thank you for your service to our country. I respect that. It is a tough lesson for all of us modern ladies to learn: this Titus 2! It is so important to be a homemaker. You have done something equally as tough as being in the Corps! Thank you for being teachable and spiritually minded. Congratulations.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

Ladies I have added a few more comments on the verses, in the original article. I liked what Adam Clarke said in the 1700's. And I also like the fact that Titus two simplifies life for women. It does not give details of how to keep house. It leaves that to the older women to pass on their knowledge. It does not give all the details of raising children. It gives the message that the home is the focus of the woman's life. The prevailing culture then, and now, was the opposite. Women in the church were not to be like the women who were not in the church. They were instead to be discreet keepers at home. I always thought of discretion as being private and dedicated, serious and almost not wanting to be noticed. Today we have a problem, especially in America. American women are given images of women who are famous, rather than women who are good and righteous and God-fearing. Many girls grow up wanting to be "stars" or immportant, well thought of professionals of some type. They dont see the role in the home as being a shining light or a star. In the stores, there are posters everywhere, and on blank notebooks that they will be using in school, of the music and movie stars. They will not be content to be nice little homemakers. The world mocks it continually. They mock the discretion of Christian women. it is to be expected. but daughters must be taught that the world is going to try to discourage them.

Anonymous said...

I greatly appreciate that you wrote so much more and in detail...so very encouraging and good guidance too...

Anonymous said...

I greatly appreciate that you wrote so much more and in detail...so very encouraging and good guidance too...

Anonymous said...

There are a lot of foolish older women. Some who stay home spend time ridiculing homemakers online. It seems like such a waste of time, and this is one reason that older women were told to straighten up first. I noticed the first part was to get the older men and women in line, and after that, they were given the job of teaching the younger ones. They cant teach if they arent qualified. The qualifications are clear: they have to live a good clean life and they have to be sound in doctrine. They dont necessarily have to be married. They can be a widow. Widows in our society are often at a loss as what to do with themselves. Their job is cut out for them if they decide to teach younger women. And, you can teach through publishing or through hospitality, through letters and through example.

Anonymous said...

The comments you added under 'keepers at home' were very eye-opening for me, and a young wife and mother. You have given me hope, that the spiritual may take more time to develop, but that it will on day come together with the physical acts, and the service (to husband, children, and home) will become a 'spiritual act of worship'. How inspiring. Thank you!

Anonymous said...

I am enjoying this section very much. It is like an online Bible study. I especially appreciate your comments.

Anonymous said...

I love to stay at home, because I am able to nurture others. I am not so busy "climbing the corporate ladder" that I cannot help the young people who are horribly neglected by their "otherwise occupied" parents.

Just this week I watched a three year old for a young mother that is recovering from child birth. I loaned my computer and fixed dinner for a high school friend of my son. I gave a free haircut to a very poor young man. My family and I fed and brought to church three young children whose indigent parents refuse to bring them even though they beg to come. We bring as many children as we can to church with us. They love it! One visit, and they usually want to come every time. Their whole attitude and demeanor changes. I love IT! Show the love of Christ to them.

When you are at home you have more opportunity to look around and see others who have great needs. Along with caring for your own families needs, God will enable you to make a vast difference in the lives of the hurting and neglected children that are all around us. You can make their lives and their futures better.

Children now are really hurting and missing the love and support of their busy, busy, busy, parents. I truly consider them to be "orphans" and so much in need. Not all can be helped, but many can be. Look around you. Maybe a school shooting or two can averted by your kindness. Give the Children some Hope and a reason to live.

Anonymous said...

It is rather interesting for me to read the post. Thanx for it. I like such themes and everything connected to them. I definitely want to read more soon.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

I was reading the passage again and found an interesting pattern.

First, the older men are addressed. The instructions to them are given.

Then, the older women are addressed.

The younger women are mentioned in relation to the older women: the older women are to teach them to be good wives, mothers and homemakers.

Lastly, the young men are addressed. They are to be sober minded and sincere.

The members of the body are to "show a pattern of good works" and sound speech. A pattern of good works would mean doing good in their lives. It would become a habit they would be known by. Then, it would bring the contrary ones who criticised and condemened them, to shame.

This is certainly the best way to overcome the attacks on the family and the accusations levelled against the homemakers. Live in such a way, being busy and being serious about your marriage, your children and your house, so that those who attack, will be ashamed of themselves.

Anonymous said...

Dear Mrs. Lydia,

Thank you for your great post. I thoroughly enjoyed it!! Whenever I need inspiration to continue on this path of homemaking, I stop to visit your blog.

The other day I ran across some old books that made me think of you. They are free online if you ever have a chance to read them, I hope you enjoy by a wonderful pastor John S.C. Abbott:

The Path of Peace, or a Practical Guide to Duty and Happiness

http://books.google.com/books?id=Do1pAAAAMAAJ&dq=john%20sc%20abbott%20path%20of%20peace&client=firefox-a&pg=PA5#v=onepage&q=john%20sc%20abbott%20path%20of%20peace&f=false

and The Mother At Home, or the Principles of Maternal Duty

http://books.google.com/books?id=F04MAAAAYAAJ&dq=the%20mother%20at%20home&client=firefox-a&pg=PR3#v=onepage&q=&f=false

Thank you so much for your dutiful, gentle, spirit. It shines through, and I truly believe God used you and others like you to have affected my life in a profound way. I went from a fiercely independent feminist (I didn't even know it really) dead-set against more than one child, working all the time, to quitting, having another baby, homeschooling, and trying my best to learn to follow God's design and plan for women. Recently, my daughter was asked what she was going to do when she grows up, and she said "Stay at home!" I smiled to myself at the shocked looks on their faces. Thank you for standing up for what is right despite all the detractors. Your work has made a difference.

God bless you.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

To the young lady who is studying Titus 2: try looking in the Youngs Analytical Concordance from 1898, for word meanings in the Koine Greek, which is the original language that passage was written in. Youngs Analytical finds the several meanings of words (such as all the different Greek words for love, and their different meanings) whereas, other concordances do not find the other word meanings or applications. You can find Youngs Analytical online and use it. Yes, the words were written to the local church. Christian living was new to these people, and not all of them were familiar with God's dealings with his people in the Old Testament. This new law includes many of the same teachings, but in some cases makes them more heart felt. For example, Titus 2 tells older women to teach younger women to love their children and love their husbands. And, the older women were in a teaching position. Having laboured at home to raise their own children, and being over the age of 60, they can give their feet a rest, and be free of some of the burden of child rearing and now be in an advisory position. It is unfair to make elderly women look after younger women's children while the younger women go to work. A lot of people think that is fine, but elderly women do not always have the stamina or the health or the quickness to raise small children. That is the job of the mothers. There is a trend overseas to put the younger women to work in factories, and leave the children with the aging grandmothers. This is not taught in the Bible. The older women may teach if they desire, but they are certainly not required to raise their children's children. Young women need to raise their own children while they are young and active.

Anonymous said...

I will add to that: an older woman in perfect health can lose her strength and get very worn out if she is required to take care of her childrens children for an extended period of time. If an older woman is in good physical condition, it still does not mean that she should be doing the job that the younger women are supposed to do. That is partly what Titus 2 teaches: that the older women are to teach the YOUNGER women to love THEIR children and keep THEIR houses. THe world always has it backwards, trying to make a better plan for the family. Dont fall for it.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

Thank you all for taking time to comment such informative things about this passage. I was thinking about the previous comments about mothers leaving their children in the care of grandmothers while they go to work. I believe those younger women are protected by the Titus 2 clause by being given a position in life that is worthwhile, God-given, and beneficial to generations beyond them. The impact of the young woman's life on her children will be felt for a long time. Titus 2 gives the young women something better to do; something far greater than working in a lawyers office, where her work will not be remembered after she is gone. At home, you'll create memories for your childre that they will carry on to their children. Its so important not to lose that time with them. Raising them yourself will help you develop important skills, too.

Emmarinda said...

I live in an area with a huge military population, with fathers and/or mothers serving. The trend among people here is that children are often relegated to the care of their poor, old grandmothers. My, albeit anecdotal, observation of this phenomena is that children raised this way soon realize and exploit the physical weakness and reduced stamina of these older ladies. The youngsters, as a result, run wild and are typically disobedient, insolent, and disrespectful of their grandmothers. How unfair to these older women, who are worn out and overwhelmed! The parents, sometimes holding down four jobs between them (no lie), put their money into buying large houses in upscale neighborhoods that now have the dubious distinction of sprouting "gangs" of disaffected youth. The drug use and STD infection rate are sky high among these upper and middle class children, by the way. Now, even the most carefully parented children can go astray, but my point is that the way we live our lives in this day and age has not improved our quality of life, and in many ways has really made it much worse for everybody, old and young.

Anonymous said...

Dear Sister Lydia,
yes, it is a joy to sit at the feet of Godly men and women. Let us never ever take them for granted, the ones who fought the good fight of faith and allowed Jesus to prevail in their lives.

Thank you for consistently sharing the Scriptures in their simplicity. The Word is quick and powerful and sharper than any two edged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit and of the joints and marrow.

Don't give up some will get this message.

LadyLydiaSpeaks said...

VERY GENEROUS COMMENTS...I hope I can live up to the scripture and do more in the future. I think there is an attack on the home and the family, and on the homemaker. The best thing to do in the face of opposition is to do more of it and do it better. Then give yourself the rewards of it: bake something nice to eat, make tea in a nice teapot and serve it cups with saucers; make a new dress, go shopping for good things for your home, buy a bunch of flowers for the table. There is nothing anyone can do to separate us from the love of God, and that love is proven by devotion and compliance to his word. So no matter how hard someone tries to debilitate and discourage you, laugh at the foolishness of it and do something great.

Anonymous said...

Lydia,

My Sister in Law has just given birth to her first little one - a daughter, just over a week ago now. She has expressed a deep wish to not go back to work - at all - (her husband, my brother, is in full agreement, stay home with her and parent properly (they see right through the childcare smokescreen - why go to work just to put the child into care which will gobble up the better part of the second wage when they could raise it themselves, with their values, on one income...)

They are somewhat nervous and unsure of this; though they're good old fashioned folk full of commonsense, but I would be most appreciative of a good book just for women, and families in their situation so they don't lose heart. Sadly, they've been both burnt by religion and have no interest in Christianity, so the selection needs to be descrete. (and something workable in an all but socialist setting).

Please, ladies, pray for this new family, longing to do it themselves!! and perhaps be the first in a new generation of back to healthy family and child-raising...

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