Family Education

There is a lot of talk about "homeschooling" going around, and for the sake of understanding, we did "homeschool" our children. However, the term "homeschooling" does not accurately describe the experience at all. For us, it was family based learning.

We didn't always stay at home, or even learn at home, and we didn't conduct it like any school. Wherever we were, we could learn, and we looked for opportunities not just to collect knowledge, but to experience life, grow in wise behaviour, and develop our thinking so that we could understand the things that confronts us in life. We thought about the pioneers and how the children participated in life with their parents, erstwhile learning to read and write in the evenings by lamplight. This seemed far more balanced that constantly doing paperwork.

"School" in Greek is "schule," which means "spare time." In bygone days, people would take some leisure time to go and listen to lectures on various subjects such as science, mathematics or philosophy. We had this "spare time" concept in mind, when we nurtured our children. (Today, not everything has to be learned in a place set apart for book-learning. Knowledge is accessible and widely available in many forms!)

Life was to be lived, and school was reading and writing about the life we were discovering. Once the children learned to read, they were encouraged to research from books and magazines, the things that fascinated them, whether it be a country of the world, a language, art, music, science, writing, landscaping, or publishing.

Every day was filled with purpose, and that is why family-based learning continues to affect my attitude and my life as a grandparent. Even when the children are grown, there is so much to look forward to. When our family-based education was completed, I felt that we were just getting started, but it really had never ended. By showing the children how to research something, or how to overcome a problem, or see a project through from start to finish, we gave them the tools for victory in their lives. Each child was taught to have a strong sense of purpose, which to this day remains our basis of stability, from the age of 2 to 62. (the exact ages of the youngest to the eldest in our combined families).

One thing that I observed about many people who were just married was that they were depressed. When I inquired about their backgrounds, I found that all of them were highly socialized in their youth, with full schedules of activities. Family-based learning, however, was more of a natural socialization, brought about by their service to others, hospitality, classes they took in music or art, and their own businesses which brought them into contact with customers. They didn't have years and years of forced socialization. When the socialized children married, they had greater difficulty settling down and being quiet at home with one person.

A habit that helped our family a great deal was a forced "quiet time." A few hours a day, usually during the hot afternoons, they were each to find a place by themselves and either take a nap, lay down, read, write, or just stare into space for awhile, and be quiet. At first, they didn't like this, and it was their mother who fell asleep, while they crept around doing things. Eventually they came to look forward to this quiet time and now as adults, say that those were the most precious hours of their youth.

Another rich experience that we enjoyed was daily walks. There was a special technique to this. Everyone had to observe what was going on around them and use all their senses to experience it. And, not only would the physical sensations of the walk be important;-the spiritual benefits as well. When we arrived home, they were encouraged to write in their journals everything that happened on those walks, both within their minds and in nature, which included little drawings and colored illustrations.

I wasn't always actively looking for "lessons" and it wasn't a drill-seargant type of education, but when there was an opportunity to expose my children to something good, I took it. Walking past a store, I might notice an advertisement for a free classical concert in a local park. One advantage of home based learning, is that you are not confined to the classroom and can get up and go when you want to. There might be a nice sunny day where good common sense dictated that it would be better to take a sketchpad and some paints to a scenic area outside and learn about art. A cold, gloomy day may have triggered off a lesson in hospitality. (People need hospitality more on dark, dreary afternoons).

Family-based learning, or "parental schooling," is very flexible and enables the children to live a real life and learn how to have a good family of their own someday. Instead of waking them up in the dark hours and rushing them "somewhere else," they learn to be content where they are. One of the things that many people suffer when they settle down to home life as young married couples, is restlessness. If you get up in the morning and go somewhere else for years and years, it is difficult to overcome this tendency.

We found that a study of our society of the 1800's yielded a great insight into how life was conducted when people were more family oriented. This might be a study worthwhile for other families, to discover how our forebearers of the Victorian era conducted their daily lives, what they ate, how they dressed, their recreation, their crafts, hobbies and art, their family celebrations, and their businesses.

As a result of our family based learning, our children have had a rich education. When they were a certain age, they were encouraged to order as many books as they liked, from several catalogs, on the subjects that interested them. In the early 80's there wasn't as much available to the homeschool community, so we used a catalog called "Dover." One of our children ordered some books about Leonardo Da Vinci and Michaelangelo.
(One of these artists was the inventor of the paint-by-number method).

There are those who say that education cannot be accomplished unless a child sits in a room with 25 other children and listens to one teacher. They insist he must also be in that school building daily for 5 hours. This does not guarantee that the student is absorbing what he is learning, nor does it prove that the mind is engaged fully all of the time. Family based learning, in our experienc, kept the mind alert to the conscience--to the needs of others, to personal responsibilities and to the presence of God.

Sometimes people were very concerned that being cooped up together we would grow tired of one another and just quarrel all the time, but they inteacted together just fine and retreated to private places when they wanted to be left alone. One cannot say that going to school in a group was any more exciting. Often those children grew tired of the same group and even dreaded facing them day after day. We found home a place of forbearance, with a chance to start afresh with each other the next day.

As these elements of family learning were translated into the home, respect for life and property increased. Our home became a most desireable spot. We shared our values and preferred one another's company for an outing, a conversation or a tea party. The house was a place of beauty and order. The way we spent our time had meaning. Home was a place where we were happy.

(More to come)

"Into the Garden" by Susan Rios