Monday, August 15, 2005
Guiding the Home Part 1
It is a very sorrowful thing to know that so many preachers have ignored the scriptures. Fearing loss of their popularity, or that the church income may diminish, (maybe from the financial contributions of the working women in the congregation?) they often design their sermons around the way people are living, rather than the way they should live.
One particular subject that is causing a lot of confusion is the question of women being at home, guarding the home, (these days, someone really needs to be there, to literally guard the place), putting their talents and time into homemaking and taking care of their husbands and/or children.
Many of these men are too young to remember the sermons that used to be preached on the subject. They don't know how this subject was preached in the past. Some of them came from homes where their own fathers were preachers, and their mothers worked outside the home. They've grown up in a world where the mother working outside the home looked normal to them, and the stay-at-home mothers seemed strange.
They didn't see the demise of the home, like many of us who are growing older, have seen, when women left the home to pursue careers. They didn't see churches where people grew up and married someone else in the church and raised a happy family. They didn't see a time when children who were rebellious against their parents were considered "delinquent." Now, it all is portrayed by the counselors and the schools as "normal." It is the parents, and particularly the wife, if she is not working outside the home, who are considered abnormal.
Some people who have had these family upsets, have gone to counselling, and been told that the problem was a financial one, and that the wife needs to get a job. There are even husbands who want their wives to go to work, because they want the extra money. They reason that the wife can have her own income, and the husband will be able to pay his bills better, or even get that boat or extra car or or trip he's been wanting.
Sometimes when I've been ill and had to be recumbant, I've given into watching some of the court drama t.v. shows. It is shocking to me, although the younger generation may think it is quite normal, how many men sue their wives because they didn't pay their share of the rent! Or, many boyfriends sue their girlfriends because they bought a car together and the girl didn't pay her share of the payments. Some men even divorce their wives because the wives won't get a job, lost their job, or cannot work anymore due to injuries or illness. You could quit school, and simply sit and watch those court dramas day after day and get an adequate education in how to live in order to be successful in life, e.g.:- Just don't get involved with people that have these twisted values. Find out what they believe, before you form any kind of relationship with them.
Its just terrible the way things are going. Some men don't have any dignity whatever, and it doesn't seem to bother them a bit that they are not only not protecting women, and not looking after them financially, but they are also suing them for not "paying their share."
When I was growing up, such a thing was unheard of. Almost all men, with any Christian sensibilities, had an intense pride in looking after women and children. They would have hid with shame, if they had failed in this, or if they had sent their wives out to work, or borrowed money. It would have been admitting they weren't good providers, and that, of course, is a standard that they understood from the scriptures. There is a clear command for the men to provide for their own. There is no such command to the woman. Her work, however, is just as valuable, which is the whole point of Proverbs 31.
In part 2, I'll discuss how people are now twisting Proverbs 31 to suit themselves, making claims about this example, that would justify their way of life. Even the preachers are doing it.
Check out I Timothy 5:14. Although some versions say "widow," the original Greek is "women."
This is the command to younger women, spelled out. For older women, see Titus 2. Ministers need to highlight these scriptures with a bright yellow pen.
I don't want to leave on a sour note, so I'll assure you that there is hope for the future, and that we can change things, and be an influence on future generations, to teach things that are true and lovely, and prevent this downslide in character, in our own families.
continued in Part 2.
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1 comment:
Dear LadyLydia,
I love reading your blog. I wish you lived next door; we could wave over the fence as we hang our wash out on the line, share our surplus vegetables and perhaps have a moment to share tea while the children play nearby. Of course, I never really hang out my wash (maybe four or five times per year), haven't had a garden in three years, and never socialize with my neighbors. It is a nice fantasy, though, isn't it? Seriously, I do so love knowing that there are other women "out there" -- even in cyberspace -- who like to make staying home a form of art. My six boys and one girl keep the dirt flowing and the noise level high, but I love being at home, making a home, and guarding it. Since I was little, I have enjoyed housework, decorating, cleaning, and making things "just so." Your words are always such an encouragement. Thank you and may God bless you. Marci
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