Happiness and The Domestic Scene

Together Tonight, by Dennis Patrick Lewan

Home is a place we should be drawn to; a place that we would not want to leave. There have been times when my house looked as though someone had taken every posession I had, from books to clothing to kitchen items to papers and home decorating accessories and thrown it all in a huge pile, taken a giant spoon, and stirred it up like a tossed salad. I learned ways of dealing with this that helped me keep my composure and inspired me at the same time. Because our homes are used and lived-in, there will always be times like this. No real home stays in perfect order.

If the tossed salad description defines your house, you might enjoy having a few tips that will alleviate the stress and help you have a pretty home.

Grace Cottage by Susan Rios

Your first thought may be to get some kind of professional help, but maid service is expensive. If you will do it yourself, the money can be used for some needed or luxury item for your home. When cleaning the bathroom, you might notice it is really time to get some new towels or soap. Take advantage of this hard work and reward yourself with something nice for the room, even if it is a pleasantly scented bar of hand made soap.

Go to Sleep Early

It is easier to look forward to a difficult task, if you are well rested. It is more difficult if you just can't get going because of a groggy, sleepy feeling. The next morning, get ready to put a plan in action by doing the following:

Get bathed and dressed, fix your face and hair, add a light scent and put on nice shoes.

This action gives you a feeling of being prepared and put-together. If someone comes to the door, even if your house is a wreck, at least you look like you are in control. If you have to go to a store or meet your husband somewhere, you will be ready. No one in the public will have a clue that your house is a mess. When you are dressed up, you look like you came from a beautiful home. Make sure your clothes are ironed if necessary, and that you don't look like you "had your clothes thrown on with a pitchfork."

Enlist the Help of the Children

Children should, from a very young age. Most children start trying to help, and even asking "can I help?" as young as 18 months. It makes it a little slower, but it is certainly worth it for mothers to at least let them think they are helping. Later on when there is a big burden of a disorderly home, these children's help can really make a difference. Some two year olds are very smart, and can take some item and put it in a particular room for you. They love to fold towels and washcloths at 3 and 4. Five-year-olds love to vacuum. Two year-olds can actually put their own clothes away. It takes time to teach them but that little bit of extra help, makes a big difference. Young children like to stand on a chair near the kitchen sink and help dry dishes. Older children and those in the teen years, are capable of cleaning and arranging an entire room themselves.

Clean the living room or front room, or room nearest the front door, first.

You may find that this is the best thing you will do. It is the place people will see first, and it is the place you will return to just to look at, when the rest of the rooms are still disrupted.

This is the room that will greet anyone that comes to the door. If you rarely have company, then just think of the scene that will greet your husband, when he comes home from work, and try to make it cheerful.

To clean this room, put everything in piles:

books

papers and any related items like pencils and pens

magazines

cloth items: clothing, blankets, towels

toys

accessories that do not belong

This is where your children will be the most help. They can take the piles to designated places, to be dealt with later. Send the books to be set near a bookshelf, the clothes to the laundry or to various bedrooms, but do not worry about putting them away. Just worry about the room you are working on.

Make sure the floor is bare and the furniture is bare, with the exception of decorative accessories such as pillows or rugs.

Vacuume this room.

Wipe dust off surfaces of tables and shelves.

Reward yourself.

There are two things you can do. Put something interesting in the room by either making a display on a shelf or corner, or hanging a picture, or lighting a candle. I use the battery operated tea lights. Put on some soothing music and get your nice tea set out and make some of your favorite tea and put it on a tray.

Do the rest of the rooms and spaces, in order of importance, this same way.

When you have done the labor of the room, give yourself a reward by doing something to the room that is appropriate: the kitchen can have something you like to smell, in the oven, such as a favorite muffin or soup. A laundry room, a bedroom, a dining room, can all have something in them that give the family pleasure and a feeling of home.

Take time out between long jobs to refresh yourself.

Checking your hair and brushing your teeth or grooming yourself in some manner, seems to give a little more significance to the jobs at hand.

Invite someone over, even if it is your sister or mother, and make it a week ahead. This is often a very motivating way to get your house clean. Serve tea and scones. If you do not like tea, but still want to use a tea set, I have a nice tea recipe:

Heat water in a kettle to a rolling boil. Put a few strawberries, blueberries, or any kind of fruit, into a sauce pan and mash it up. Add the boiling water and let it set a few minutes. Strain it through a strainer into your tea pot. When you serve this, the color will be beautiful and the scent will be soothing. Honey tastes great in this, but milk and cream will curdle. Another kind of tea you can make is with your favorite spices in your cabinet: put a fourth teaspoon of ground cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg, etc. together in a tea pot and add boiling water. Just choose the flavors you like best, including things like vanilla. This type of tea tastes well with milk or cream or just plain.

Even when you have moved on to another room, you need to go back to rooms already cleaned, and check them.

When the children see you picking up any little thing: paper, a stray shoe, books, etc., they will eventually develop the same habits. After a room is done, if you are in the room, be alert to the clutter-crime and get after it immediately. I have explained before about a friend I know that, even while sitting in a chair and relaxing, will look around the room and reach over to a side table to straighten something or remove something. Once it becomes a habit, it will not be necessary to have a regular cleaning day.

Keep your mood on the upside.
Even if you feel aggravated about the whole thing, force yourself to disguise this, and make a happy atmosphere for everyone. If you really believe women should be home, then show yourself, your family and the world, the beautiful results of it.

I have discovered how powerful it is just to dress up and get the front room clean. It somehow gives me a starting place, and a place of reference for doing the rest of the house when things look like they got stirred up with a great big spoon.