Wednesday, October 24, 2007

How to Stop Fretting About Politics...

...and enjoy an abundant life. A few days ago I sent an article into LAF about ways to make political changes in our society while improving life at home. I'm really looking forward to Jennie Chancey updating LAF so that everyone can read it. In the interim I sent a copy to Mrs... She may have been influenced by it, hence her decision to move on to a more effective web approach in her life. I really appreciated her first hand experience living inside of communism, and its efforts to get women out of the roles of homemakers, wives and mothers at home.

This painting, although made in the 19th century, is amazingly modern. Click on the name of the artist for more pieces by him, and you will see what I mean.

Flower Girl
Flower Girl
Art Print

Harlamoff, Alexei...
Buy at


Mrs.E said...

I've been visiting here for a few months and am always inspired by your posts. I am glad you pointed me in the direction of LAF. It's amazing how encouragement to becoming a Godly Woman is acquired through such wonderful and humble blog(s) such as yours.

The Proverbs Wife said...

I really love this print (Flower Girl). I wanted to add a print to my post "Teenagers" and this one would have worked perfectly. Thanks for stopping by

Anonymous said...

Dear Lady Lydia and fellow women,
I need some advice please or encouragement perhaps. My inlaws are coming to visit this afternoon and will be staying several days. They are Christians and love my family very much. However, it is with mixed emotions that I welcome them to my home. When they come they make themselves at home, a little too much at home for my comfort. While I enjoy their company, I somewhat dred their visits. Many of their habits seem very inconsiderate to me. For instance, they do not pick up after themselves, they are loud and sarcastic, and they feed their dog from my table. This last instance bothers me not only because it is poor manners but also because I take time and care to plan out meals for my family, stretching each dollar. I am very offended when perfectly good food is fed to a dog when I could use it for leftovers for my own children. I am not opposed to pets. We have 2 dogs at our home. I just need advice on how to handle the matter or how to change my attitude perhaps. My husband spoke to his father about this in private once and he acted very offended. I can't seem to get these little annoyances off my mind. Does anyone out there experience similar things with extended family? How do you deal with it, in a Christ-like manner?
Thank you!!

Lydia said...

Your husband should take them out to eat to provide some relief from this.

YOu can also take the children and eat elsewhere if this bothers you, or eat earlier and then let the husband eat with his parents and the dog.

Part of the problem is that such people see the family as having nothing better to do than be available to entertain them, and they aren't self conscious enough to avoid being a burden.

If mealtimes are the most aggravating of the visit, you can get your husband to be in charge of them. I think sometimes the men don't feel the problem because they don't prepare the meals. If he had to bring in take out food for the visit, he would begin to feel the pinch once he started parting with the money.

You should emphasize to him that you don't want the children to learn bad habits like letting the dog eat from the table. In my opinion it is entirely his responsibility to make the visit run smoothly. He shouldn't allow people to impose on you or put extra burdens on you, or aggravate you, as it HURTS HIS MARRIAGE, and he should be sensitive to that. Just put him in charge of the meals for the time, and if he wants you to cook, then he has to comply with your requirements at meal times: no dogs allowed. If you are secure in your marriage you should be able to insist that propriety be followed at meal times and if they dont' like it they can get their own meals, and pay for them.

Anonymous said...

It is possible your husband will want to turn the problem entirely over to you. If he does, then you will be within your rights to call the parents and tell them it really bothers you to let the dog eat off the table and also that you are trying to train your children to be polite when visiting at other people's houses and you would appreciate it if they would help you out by not adding to your burden---by picking up the papers and things they drop, and being aware of the work they create. Tell them when you visit them you would do the same. "I certainly would not let my cat eat the food you served us, if I visited you, and I would not leave papers and napkins and tissues around, and I wouldn't create a mess for you to clean up. I just wouldn't." Ask them if there is a way they could suggest that would make the visit easier on all of you.

Anonymous said...

Your husband (preferably, since they are his parents) can say at the beginning of the meal, "Please do not feed the dog from the table." And he can explain why if they ask.

About the messes, he or you can ask with a smile, "Are you done for the evening? We'd like to clean up this mess before going to bed."

caelids said...

Ughh...what an unfortunate situation. My father and stepmother are quite similar--high impact guests, I guess you might say. Except that last time they brought a dog he tried to bite several people. I had to have a "no-BS" talk with my dad about keeping the dog chained up.

Your hubby should definitely be the one with the responsibility of "handling" his parents. He is the master of the house, anyway. If they don't respect him in that role, you can hardly expect them to respect you.

For the rest, I think taking the high road is the better be the best Christian example you can be of turning the other cheek and treating others as you would like to be treated. And then offering your thanks to God that both parties are prosperous enough to maintain separate domiciles.

Good luck.

Anonymous said...

You've stated on other posts that beautiful art should be around the house and need not be expensive. I've always agreed with that point, but I have had one small problem. I love the artwork that you post, however, it's really not to my husband's taste. He prefers modern art and has really odd taste, actually. However, I believe this particular piece, along with others done by the same artist, might just be the ticket. The girl is hauntingly beautiful, and it's hard not to look into those eyes. The colors would be awesome in my living room. We have a black leather sectional that I hate, but this portrait would add such class to the room. Thanks for posting it.

Anonymous said...

I was wondering about that article that you mentioned having sent to LAF...I see that Laf has been updated since then (not the Lady Lydia page though) but I don't think that article is there. Is there a way you can let us know the link to it or do you know if it will be on LAF soon? You don't have to publish this on your comments...I just couldn't find a regular email addy for you! :)
-Crystal in Alaska

Anonymous said...

I just wanted to say that I read the article on LAF about not fretting. I loved it. You are right on target with your points. I also wanted to encourage you to PLEASE keep writing on your blog about such issues!!!! There is such a need. I seek your perspective daily via this blog and I am much excited whenever I find a new article posted.

God bless your efforts. I am blessed by your words concerning our role as women in the home. You are an amazing lady. Sherri

Unknown said...


At last your article was put up on LAF! I was awaiting it eagerly since you mentioned it would soon be going up. Thank you for the other lovely articles you have done here on your blog. You have been MOST prolific in the past week or so! I have actually fallen behind in my reading here but am quite happy about it. It means more to come back for and plenty to think about plus good commentary to savor.

I did get over to LAF today to read your piece on politics and want to thank you for writing it. I am always encouraged and strengthened when I read your articles. You have put forth another fine piece of writing in that piece.