Sunday, December 16, 2012

The Role of Older Women

Today I am sharing a tract I wrote, that is printable. I hope to have the time to do more of these in the future, elaborating further on the many aspects of ways older women can provide good ideas and instruction to help younger women can have good success in home living.

Ladies Bible Studies 
by Lydia Sherman

Older Women
in the Church

Looking into the Word of God to Discover How the Older Women Can Be Helpers in the Lord's Church.

In the Lord's church, we are obligated to find our answers in the Word of God, and not depend on the trends of the prevailing culture. To find out what the role of older women is, all we need to do is read and practice what is written in Titus 2, verses 1-5:

1But speak thou the things which become sound doctrine:
2 That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience.
3 The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;
4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,
5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
These verses lay out things that the churches of Christ need from older women. These needs will always be with us from generation to generation. 

Older women who have been wives, mothers and homemakers for many years will have a wealth of information and insight to share with the younger women, but first, they must be good examples.
Verses 1, 2 and 3 mention sound doctrine, soberness (serious attitude), patience, teachers of good things.
Verse 5 says the older women are to teach the younger women to be “keepers at home.” Older women must teach the younger women in several ways: 1. By showing them the scriptures, 2. By their own life example, and 3. By teaching how to love their husband, love their children, and keep house.

If an older woman teaches the younger women to be keepers at home, she must also be a keeper at home. It is hard to serve two masters. If a woman works outside the home, she may find it difficult and tiring to keep her own home and to pass on her knowledge of home keeping to younger women. In order to teach “good things” an older woman must also live them, and be a good example.

Today there are many marvelous communication and publication avenues that can help an older woman teach a younger women these important things:

  1. She may share her own home with younger women by extending hospitality to them in order to share with them how to have a stable marriage, how to lovingly and effectively raise their children, and how to keep the home.
  2. She may use the telephone or email to teach lessons on marriage, children and homemaking.
  3. She may have a daily weblog or website as a teaching tool, or teach classes during the week.
  4. She may publish a newsletter to distribute to the younger women, and she may write letters.
Daughters may learn from their mothers at home. There are many other young women who need this training, and so the older women are very much needed in the church to teach the important lessons of Titus chapter 2. How does this help the church? Older women will teach younger women to encourage their husbands and children to become strong members of the Lord's church and carry out His commission.

 Go here to print this out as a tract.

I am linking this article to Romans 16:16  blog.


Anonymous said...

Can you please give advice on parenting during a crisis? How does a mother pull herself together and make a happy home when she her heart is heavy?

I am sorry this is not a happy, light question or comment this time of year, but many parents have heavy hearts these days.

Thank you.

Lydia said...

Send me your email and I'll invite you to the blog about raising children. Email me at

Anonymous said...


You responded to my question on your blog about parenting during difficult times by suggesting I send you an email for information on your parenting blog. I truly appreciate your suggestion and am very interested in the blog.

I have been a reader of Homeliving for a long time and I have learned so much there. I think it is very kind of you to offer such information free of charge for homemakers like me. I was raised with two working parents who had little regard for their children or the home we lived in. As a result, things looked good from the outside, but inside, there was unhappiness, dirt and disorder most of the time. We were raised with the bare minimum of religion, and I attended church maybe five times during my childhood. I left home at 18 without knowing how to do laundry, cook, care for, or clean anything and lived quite poorly for many years as a result. Things started to improve after I realized how deficient I was in homemaking skills and began to look at homemaking books and blogs for advice. I also joined a lovely church, and we now attend church every weekend as a family.

I want to do better by my children, and I think I am doing so. Your blog is one of the most helpful I have seen, and I look forward to information on your parenting blog.

Thank you and I hope you have a wonderful Christmas.

By the way, I live not far from where the tragedies took place and my childrens' schools have police stationed outside them. There are so many reminders of the horror, even at church yesterday. That is what prompted my question. It is hard to put aside the sadness and make a nice Christmas right now, as you can imagine, but I know I must.

Anonymous said...

I have to say that it is hard to put aside everything that is going on in the United States right now, or for that matter even the whole world. My heart is very heavy for my children's future and even my own. How do you find the strenght to carry on. I realize that we do have the Lord, but I'm startin to realize that things are happening that I never dreamed would come to pass in my lifetime. It is hard just to carry on the regular activities of the day much less with any hope for the future.

Anonymous said...

hello-to the anonymous woman who is heavy hearted. I would like to comment if I may. I had a prodigal son for 6 long years.The Holidays were quite difficult, but I had to learn to focus on God who is Sovreign. When during the days when I could hardly put one foot in front of another, HE gave me peace that passeth all understanding. I also memorized quite a bit of Scripture to keep my mind renewed. God gave me the strength that I need for each moment; not 6 days down the road, but for the moment:) I also focused on simplifying my life and cutting out quite a bit of distractions and stayed close to my heavenly Father. My son is home and has been completely restored-Praise God and I have never forgotten those lessons God taught me and I bow in Humility to what Christ and only He can do. I could write at length, about it, but I find that most "Christians" want quick simple answers and quick fixes but there are really none, but sitting at the feet of our Master & listening to Him and being obedient. Thank you.

Anonymous said...

Thank you, Becky, for the response you posted~I found it very edifying and encouraging.

Anonymous said...

"In the Lord's church, we are obligated to find our answers in the Word of God, and not depend on the trends of the prevailing culture."

This is a much-needed reminder. There are times I find myself looking to other's writings, blogs, etc. before going to the Scriptures to search out what God says. Today there are SO many different opinions and ideas on everything. I need to be very careful to compare what other's say to what God says in His Word so that I am following and obeying Him rather than a person, culture, etc.

Finding Joy said...

If an older woman teaches the younger women to be keepers at home, she must also be a keeper at home. It is hard to serve two masters. If a woman works outside the home, she may find it difficult and tiring to keep her own home and to pass on her knowledge of home keeping to younger women. In order to teach “good things” an older woman must also live them, and be a good example.

I found this paragraph rather sad - my mother and her sisters where the most wonder Christian ladies I have ever know, but some worked outside of the home. Regardless of this, they were older women (my mother is now 80 and her sisters have all past away) that could give the most wonderful advice to the younger women and ones to look up to. These older women, who are wise with knowledge shouldn't be disregarded because they didn't remain in the home 100%.

Anonymous said...

Thank you Lady Lydia for your lovely post! I find myself now knocking on the door of becoming that "older woman " as my children are now all in their teens, and are discerning how to best serve God with their lives as adults. The advice you've given is very helpful, especially about being living examples of what God would have us to teach younger women. I am sure some people can point out exceptions to what you've written, but, as the old saying goes ; exceptions don't prove the rule. For every "successful working woman", there are many, many, who struggle. The old paths that gave our society stable homes and families were there for a reason.

Anonymous said...

I believe that all the problems in our society can be traced back to women making choices to work outside the home. Think of most any problem that ails us as a nation and you can follow it back to disobedience on our part-we don't want to obey God, it is just too hard or doesn't make sense to those around us and we don't want to be talked about. Until we give up our will and do what He says we will not see any changes in society as a whole.

Lydia said...

JoLuise, I always get the idea that you are sensitive to this subject and ready to correct me on the point.

However I believe that the scriptures are clear, and if you are sensitive it is because you have not quite accepted the truth of those verses; and that a woman cannot be as fully effective as a teacher , especially time-wise, if she is occupied full time elsewhere.

Furthermore I believe these verses were addressed to older women, and older women is translated as women over the age of 65. That brings up some interesting advantages: at that age she would have her hard work behind her, and her children raised, her house to herself, and have the time to serve the church in that capacity of teaching. At that age, even if she had worked in a career, she would have her pension and be at available to help others in the church. I wonder though, how long women are expected to work. I read on a blog once that women could easily work clear into their 70's. Is the work place so absent of workers that the elderly have to be in the labor force? I mean, when does it quit? And aren't there enough young people to work? Karl Marx, who wrote the Communist Manifesto, stated that women did not contribute anything at home and needed to be out working. His goal was to get every woman working outside the home, and he did not think that homemaking was of any importance. While we pride ourselves on being in democratic, western countries, enlightened by God's word, we have to a large extent adopted portions of Karl Marx's beliefs.

And of course I'm not accusing anyone who works outside the home of being a communist, but it is just the general attitude of putting women into the workforce and making it a priority instead of the importance of the home.

Anonymous said...


I think the point you made about the women having lived a life of homemaking is for the purpose of showing a reputation. If an older woman has not shown the example of being a homemaker, then why should a younger woman want to seek her as a mentor? If she, on the other hand, is known for her dedication to the Biblical role, then the younger women will want to seek her experience. After all, it is about learning to be keepers at home, not about how to balance work and home, or how to do both. While there will be women who work outside the home, the instructions of Titus 2 were to the members of the Lord's church. It was about the function of the older women in the local congregation where they can be an influence. It was special instructions to them, to benefit the local church.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous, above, It is very important that the older women have a reputation of trying to follow Titus 2 instructions, because, as a young homemaker, I am going to look for older mentors that are qualified by those verse. Even if a career woman had some good tips, I might accept them gladly but would never use her as my role model or as a teacher. We can learn all kinds of bare facts for homemaking from anyone--Martha Stewart, magazines, etc, but the mentor thing is more of an example thing. Those people who have good homemaking tips may still not have had success in the home with their families or marriages. What I am looking for is a seasoned homemaker who had a successful marriage and home life.

Lydia said...

Yes , this is what I believe is the purpose: that a life can have an impact on someone by its reputation. And of course if an older women who was a career woman wanted to be a Titus 2 mentor, she certainly could, as long as her teaching was in alignment with the scriptures on the importance of women being good wives, mothers and homemakers. There is, however, an advantage if you have been home most of those past years, as it is like building up a type of senority and credentials, or proving yourself.

Anonymous said...

Lydia, it is good to learn from anyone who has something value to teach, whether it be a career woman or a homemaker full time. Yet, many young women like myself, would rather be mentored by someone who has been at home all those years, as we want to know how to cope with living at home and how to order our days at home; how to handle times of confinement and times of chaos, etc.