Every Thought Captive

     

                             Girl Picking Roses by Louis Lemaire, French, 1824-1910

It has been a full day and very hot weather, which I appreciated. I pray it will last a lot longer. 

Sundays always go faster than I want them to. After church there is meal time, clean-up, and then it seems like the time is gone. I like to have one simple creative activity each day, so today I will share one of my acrylic stamps. These can sometimes be purchased for a dollar or less at craft stores.

I got this acrylic set at Hobby Lobby during the half-price sale, and a pink ink pad. I remember when fountain pens were commonly used, and I like the elegant look of them. I also remember the ink bottles, so I had a brief moment of nostalgia when trying out this stamp during my leisure time.

There is a subject I have been thinking about for awhile, and it seems difficult to address but I have  decided to tackle it.  This is a request I received last year.

 The question was: What should you do if someone has been talking about you and spreading rumors that are not true?  

The lady went on to relate that she had heard that someone was saying that she and her husband were going to leave their old neighborhood and build a big house in another location. While the gossip was not malicious, just the thought of people talking about a major life-change that did not exist was disturbing.  People would ask her questions like, "So when are you moving?" or, "Who bought your old house?"

My first thought about this question is that rumors can be much worse! The person could have found out something much more personal and embarrassing, making the current rumor seem harmless, but it is an invasion of privacy and can hurt just as much as cruel, mean gossip.  When you hear a rumor about where you are going, it is like someone is taking control of your life, and that can be unsettling.

Such a rumor can be easily started just by a casual remark in which you admire a style of house in a magazine while visiting with a friend.  There is an old saying that if you give some people an inch, they will take a mile, but in reality there is an occasional person who will take something ten miles!  For that reason, it is important that Christian women put a seal on their lips regarding even some of the most harmless remarks. 

Some people are overly fascinated with the lives of other people, and can take the most congeniel conversation, embellish it and send it on its way, where it gathers even more fantastic facts and returns to the poor lady who inadvertently started it.

 "You have taken an idea in your head and then have run wild with it," said Jane Austen in her novel, "Emma." 

While the New Testament warns about tale-bearing and wandering from house to house with silly gossip, we often forget that sometimes the non-gossiper can start her own rumor by revealing the most harmless, innocent thing about herself. It gives material to the simple-minded and invites an invasion of privacy. 

Privacy is not highly respected these days. We can bring back respect for privacy by not being so free to reveal every thing, every thought, every like and dislike, every plan, every  setback, or every belief we have.  We need to save our innermost dreams and plans for The Lord.  

A popular myth is that it is not good to "bottle things up" and that it is healthier to "share."  But we need to be cautious about what we say and to whom. We need to be discerning about the maturity of the other person, so that we are thrifty with the information we give them.

One reason it is easy to spread one's own rumors by an innocent remark to someone, is that we believe that everyone is good and that since we would not try to stretch a tidbit of information 10 miles, neither would anyone else. 

 This is something homeschoolers need to teach their children. Not everyone is just like you. Not everyone is discreet. Not everyone has had good training in how to talk or has been taught what is or is not appropriate to talk about. Therefore we need to tell the children how to be cautious about what they say to people outside of the family, and also what is and what is not to be revealed that is personal, in some cases even to other family members.

"...bringing into captivity every thought..."  (2 Cor. 10:5b)

When you take a thought captive, you lock it up and do not let it escape through your lips. In a situation where someone is not necessarily spreading a vicious rumor about you, it is important to hold captive even some of the perfectly acceptable information about yourself and your family.  Not everyone needs to know even normal things about you, especially if they tend to use it for mischief.

We do not always realize how a very innocent remark can be taken and exaggerated. So, while we know the Bible reprimands the bad habit of gossip, it is essential that Christian ladies not give those who are prone to gossip, any free fodder to spread around. That means weighing everything you say and thinking before you speak everything that is on your mind. Think about how a weaker-minded person could misconstrue some normal, little thing. 

While a lady may feel upset when there is gossip spread about her for no reason, she has to do her part not to add any fuel to gossip by revealing things, as innocent as they may be. 

As to what to do about the ridiculous rumors that are spread about you, that is the question of the day.  Some people have tried to confront the perpetrator but only increased the problem.  The talker only gets more steam from a confrontation and carries more tales about the person who reprimanded them.  In the grown-up world, some people who act like children do not feel they have to learn to behave better, so they get worse and worse.  It is best to avoid them, or else confine your remarks to the weather.

ITalebearer

(n.) One who officiously tells tales; one who impertinently or maliciously communicates intelligence, scandal, etc., and makes mischief.

I think the key to this is the definition: and makes mischief.  

Normal people who have good sense can have a conversation and not grasp on to any thing that is said and take it beyond what was said or intended, and will not use it to cause problems for someone, but not everyone is at the same level of mental maturity.

As example, someone asks you, "What are you doing today?"  You reply. "Nothing much."  A simple minded person who lacks discernment and has no understanding of discretion might tell someone that you do nothing at home all day. When that gets spread around, you will feel indignant and betrayed, but you must learn to be careful what you say to certain people.

 We have the same problem today in the way people interpret the Bible. They will sometimes read something more into a passage than is said. They will carry it to extremes.  But where the mind is trained to think properly, the meaning will be clear, without exaggeration or embellishment. This training begins in childhood but if such training is neglected, an adult can change with proper study and practice.

I am looking forward to any insights you may have on this subject, so please feel free to leave a comment.  If you prefer to be anonymous, let me know and I will change the settings.

This is a sample of how the acrylic stamps may be used to make something that looks like scrapbook paper.